The Wacky Adventures of Abraham Lincoln #84

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President Abraham Lincoln toiled in the White House kitchen most nights, well past the break of dawn, napping during boring cabinet meetings or falling asleep during reports by his generals.
Just as General Grant reeked of bourbon, Abe reeked of sugary candy.
“Why do you torture yourself this way?” asked Mary Todd.
The time will never come in this country when the people won’t know exactly what sugar-coated means,” said Abe, and he returned to the kitchen.
Under his suit, his skin shone with a glossy hard candy shell.
Soon, he’d be invulnerable to small arms fire.
But, soon enough?