Captain Lou For Mayor

Back in the Eighties, nobody was more awesome than Captain Lou Albano.
He was this huge hairy loud Italian professional wrestling coach.
The dude was freaky. He had rubber bands in his beard and pinned to his face.
He was in Cyndi Lauper’s music videos.
But then, wasn’t everybody?
His blustering shouts of wisdom held simple truths.
No, I wouldn’t vote for him if he ran for president.
And I’d hate for him to be a governor, like that Jesse guy was.
Maybe a mayor of some dying Rust Belt city.
Like Youngstown. Or Akron.
Or somewhere in New Jersey.

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