Shit Sandwich

If you have to eat a shit sandwich, don’t take your time eating it.
That just makes things worse and prolongs the taste of shit in your mouth.
Instead, eat it as fast as you fucking can.
And put as much ketchup and mustard on it as you can get away with.
Anything to mask the flavor of that shit.
If you’re lucky, you can blend it into a shake. You can drink that sandwich down in a few gulps.
When you’re done, you can go to the bathroom, stick a finger down your throat, and puke it back up.