{"id":26925,"date":"2017-03-13T12:03:51","date_gmt":"2017-03-13T17:03:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/?p=26925"},"modified":"2017-03-13T17:49:34","modified_gmt":"2017-03-13T22:49:34","slug":"to-hell","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/?p=26925","title":{"rendered":"To Hell"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"powerpress_player\" id=\"powerpress_player_1073\"><audio class=\"wp-audio-shortcode\" id=\"audio-26925-1\" preload=\"none\" style=\"width: 100%;\" controls=\"controls\"><source type=\"audio\/mpeg\" src=\"https:\/\/mp3.oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/tohell.mp3?_=1\" \/><a href=\"https:\/\/mp3.oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/tohell.mp3\">https:\/\/mp3.oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/tohell.mp3<\/a><\/audio><\/div><p>The kids say that if you hit all of the buttons on the elevator, it will take you straight to Hell.<br \/>\nBut I know that can&#8217;t be true.<br \/>\nThere&#8217;s a sign on the elevator that says &#8220;In case of fire, use stairs.&#8221;<br \/>\nAnd we all know that Hell is the eternal lake of fire.<br \/>\nTherefore, the elevator doesn&#8217;t go there.<br \/>\nYou&#8217;d have to take the stairs to get to Hell.<br \/>\nOr just fall down a really deep hole.<br \/>\nSuch as an elevator shaft.<br \/>\nMaybe the elevator floor drops out.<br \/>\nInto the shaft<br \/>\nTo Hell.<br \/>\nI think I&#8217;ll take the stairs.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The kids say that if you hit all of the buttons on the elevator, it will take you straight to Hell. But I know that can&#8217;t be true. There&#8217;s a sign on the elevator that says &#8220;In case of fire, use stairs.&#8221; And we all know that Hell is the eternal lake of fire. Therefore, &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/?p=26925\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;To Hell&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-26925","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-my-stories"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26925","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=26925"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26925\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":26936,"href":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26925\/revisions\/26936"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=26925"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=26925"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/oneadayuntilthedayidie.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=26925"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}