Category: Andrew Ian Dodge

Andrew Ian Dodge gets a little selfish with his latest story…

Selfishness is seen by many as a bad thing. It drives us human beings. You want to make money to buy stuff, get laid, find the right significant other and be comfortable. Your selfish desire for these things drives you to work harder, better and faster. This drives the economy. Why is this bad? If everyone stuck to getting what they want out of life and stopped meddling in other’s affairs life would be a hell of a lot happier for all. Sod the critics and listen to Crowley: “do what thou whilt; shall be the whole of the law.”

Am I being selfish in not plugging Andrew more in the podcasts he generously hands to me to post on the site, or is he being selfish somehow?
Maybe you’re being selfish by not sharing them with others?

Andrew Ian Dodge wants to know your intentions…

That you are evil or devout matters not a jot to me. Because what you are trying to do concerns me greatly. No respect for freedoms or others that is for sure; none but your god. Other cultures or traditions do not move your sort. Because you believe only you and yours are devout enough and true. You see offence at every turn; using it as an excuse to do harm and kill. But you forget one thing, you followers of Allah, freedom will win through. When we cry freedom its not just an act; it’s a statement of intent.

Cry freedom… isn’t that a song by Growing Old Disgracefully? Check the links under the squiggly Cthulhu thing for more.

Andrew Ian Dodge tells a tale about Gilbert…

Gilbert was content with his lot in life; sitting in his bungalow on the edge of Brecon Beacons. His colleagues thought he was nuts to retire at 45 and move to rural Wales. They thought it odd that, unlike most seismologists, he chose to retire away from fault-lines. Gilbert on the other hand knew exactly what he was doing. He, as was the previous occupant of the house, was the watcher of the hills. He was the first line of defence should any thing wake and try to come out this way. Gilbert smiled as he peered towards his hills.

I always wonder why some guys call themselves Gil, others Gilbert, and yet more call themselves Bert. Odd, eh?

Andrew Ian Dodge takes a closer look at a poll of British Muslims…

Despite the fact 90% of British Muslims feel loyal to Britain, 40% of Muslims wish to overthrow the state and replace it with a theocratic Muslim dictatorship. A “fifth-column” within the UK as it were.
Not at all reassuring is the fact that 20% in this poll felt sympathy with the “feelings & motives” of 7/7. If one adds to these statistics, the weekly protests in London over the Danish cartoons and free speech, the average British citizen can and probably does feel threatened.
One can only guess what the impact of such revelations will have on the British psyche.

I get the distinct feeling that the restrictive handgun laws will be scruitinized over the next few years.

Andrew Ian Dodge keeps up the phone stories…

This week has been a fairly tough one for football fans. First they have found out that not all footballers are the butch macho guys they idolised or lusted after; in the case of women. Now they find out that Wembley stadium, the “home” of football, will not be ready in time for its planned opening in three month’s time for the FA Cup final. The fact footie fans will have to schlep all the way to Cardiff won’t go down well. Those involved claim it will be done this year but can’t promise exactly when. Aw, what a shame!

I’m so spooked, I’m not even touching my own cell phone now.

Andrew Ian Dodge reaches out and… um… right.

Through all the rioting in the Muslim world and the Avian flu panic some may have missed the News of the Screws’ latest exclusive. Well, it seems that not all Premiership Footballers are totally straight. Not only are some willing to give each other head when drunk; at least one has come up with a novel use for the new slim-line mobile. As far as I understand you shove your phone somewhere stimulating down below and your mates call you repeatedly until you pop off. Might I suggest you don’t borrow a Premiership footballer’s phone… you never know where its been.

That’s one person I won’t have on speed-dial.

Andrew Ian Dodge is not just a voice at the other end of a wire… or is he?

What of this voice? This voice; I mean mine; the one you are hearing now. On Thursday I am off to record this voice to see if advert companies think its worth something. Needless to say I am listening to adverts more carefully these days; more closely than the actual programs to be honest. I always used to think I was being insulted when someone told me I had a voice for radio. Thought it was a clever way of saying I had a face for radio. I don’t believe that anymore. Will it end up in anything…one never knows.

I have a simple saying “In the end, we’re all dead. Have some pie.”

Andrew Ian Dodge tells a tale inspired by the Cthulhu-like squiggly things:

There is a child born of man with black eyes. Not of dark brown but of darkest opal. He will be sought by those of evil, those called the deep ones; those servants of the Great Old One Cthulhu. They seek to end his days as he is a great threat. As he grows he will know them and find them…not to join but to end them. They will seek him high & low; at all costs not matter how high. You need this boy to save us all. Do not fear eyes of black…for they might save you anon.

Know what’s a big black eye? My not getting any themes from y’all.
No themes, no stories.

Andrew Ian Dodge considers the hypocrisy of smoking bans:

One thing that has always amused me is what happens to lefties when they get into government. I am not talking the far-left frothing loons; but the soft-left carrying and sharing type. The ones who used to bleat on about various crypto-fascist “regimes” in North America and other places. In power they ban everything they can find that anyone enjoys. The latest breach of our rights is the total ban on smoking in “public” places. I seem to remember one A. Hitler banned smoking in public places on the grounds it was an affront to the Reich. Labour uber Alles!

We have that problem here, too. Shelley Sekula Gibbs of the Houston City Council is behind an all-out smoking ban in the city, but she claims to be a champion of personal freedoms.
Go figure.

Andrew Ian Dodge writes 100 words about 100 words…

I have 100 words to make you like me. 100 words to make you love me. Or is that 100 words to make you hate me. 100 words to make you respect me or would I rather you revile me? Why do I do this 100 word lark every day? What exactly does this writer, one, Andrew Ian Dodge, expect to get out of doing this daily exercise? Does he think he will be rich or famous or does he want both? I don’t have an answer and I am he. But then again do we always know our reasons?

I wonder if he’ll write 100 words about this?