Weekly Challenge #1056 – Beginning

The next topic is PICK TWO
Speeches
Discard
Mine
An empty cup
Kitchen

RICHARD

The Word
In the beginning, was the word.
And that word was ‘in’.
It’s right there, at the opening to this piece.
A simple, unassuming word. Just two letters; nothing special about it.
Other than the fact it conveys that sense of place, of presence, of the here and now… even way back when.
It’s not ‘at’ the beginning, ‘on’ the beginning, or even ‘around’ the beginning.
You’re in the moment, partaking of it, at one with it. An intrinsic part of that very point where nothing becomes something, and the intangible becomes reality.
Not bad for a simple two-letter word.

SERENDIPIDY

The detective was one of those ‘no nonsense’ types. Methodical, organised and rather intolerant.
“Let’s start at the beginning, shall we? Where were you at the time of the murder?”
He knew, as well as I, exactly where I was, but as far as I was concerned it wasn’t my job to tell him, it was up to him to work it out and build a cast iron case.
My job was simply to come up with an alibi, and in doing so, I would ruin all his hard work.
Still, that’s what he was paid for.
More fool him.

LIZZIE

Many years later, he went back up the hill. The tire swings were still there. He swayed his legs back and forth as they had done. Why did it have to happen? Why? The cold night embraced him, cuddling him in its arms. He started to cry. Why can’t I go back and undo everything? In the distance, he heard a train. Their train. The train that would take them away one day. The train that had killed her… At sunrise, he dried his tears and finally summoned the courage to take the train. For you. For us, he shouted.

TOM

Sugar Babies

In the beginning there was sugar. Lots of sugar. River, Mountains, a great desert of sugar. The people put sugar in all the foods they ate. God sat back figure if everyone was happy, he would just go an holiday. While god come up with real cool stuff, like sugar. I would take the blackest heart of the monkey people to come up with Multi Global Corporations. It took sometime but, in the end, they controlled all the sugar on the planet. Life became sad. When god back for holiday he saw how unhappy everyone was so he invented chipotle.

NORVAL JOE

With the light of understanding beginning to shine in Patrick’s eyes, he glanced at the door.

Mandi, who’s perception was greater than what Sabrina gave her credit for, shouted, “Billbert. Stop him.”

He couldn’t disobey and lunged for Patrick as he dashed for the door. Though the boy was twice Billbert’s size, the strength of Mandi’s ring more than compensated and the two tumbled to the floor.

“Thanks Mandi. I’ll take it from here,” Mrs. Weinerheimer said, and turned to Patrick. “Have a seat, dear. We need to talk.”

Patrick got up, brushed himself off, and obediently sat down.

PLANET Z

Randy was a pretty strange guy. Long greasy hair and backwards, baseball cap. Tall man, making biscuits at the chicken shack. He’d start every batch with quoting the Bible in the beginning. But it go in strange directions with his narrative as he mixed in the buttermilk and needed the dough, rolled it out, cut out the biscuits and put them on the tray and slid them in the oven. He’d speak of dark shadows and strange tentacles from space and weird ceremonies to summon them to ravage the planet. But goddamn, his biscuits were the best I’ve ever tasted.

Maynard

My cousin Maynard was a creepy kid. In kindergarten, other kids drew hopscotch on the playground. He do scary chalk outlines and would smuggle ketchup in his lunch bag to accessorize the outline. When the teacher and principal banned all chalk from the playground and searched Maynard’s lunch bag, he pondered finding a way to keep doing his art. That’s when they found the body in the playground. The police took photos drone outline, took the body away for an autopsy. The official cause was cirrhosis of the liver, but somehow they blamed Maynard. I never saw that kid again.

Duncan brothers

Don and John Duncan loved to make donuts. Their mom had a doughnut making machine in the kitchen, and they spent all day mixing up batter, frosting, and sprinkles. They came up with some really weird recipes and designs. Every Halloween, the Duncan house was the most popular house on the block. Instead of going to some college, they spent their savings on buying a bakery. Everyone bought donuts at Duncan Brothers. Until a certain multinational conglomerate sued them for using that name. They agreed to change it, and they changed the sign, but people still called it Duncan Brothers.

Browns

The Brown Twins were great at every sport. Basketball football baseball track. You name it, they were the best at it. Willie became known as Touchdown Brown, while Moses got named Hoops Brown. They went to different colleges on scholarships so that they wouldn’t take any starts or opportunities away from each other. Despite their names, they still played in all of the sports. The thing is, it was Moses that ended up a football star while Willie was a basketball star. They’re now both known as Dr Brown. Pediatricians. I think the world‘s a better place because of that.

Leftover Fights

You know what you’ve cooked is good when everybody is fighting over the leftovers. It’s a lot better than when they’re fighting over how little you’ve cooked for the group cause at least you know they’ve all had as much as they’ve wanted to eat, but they’re gonna want more later. When they ask you the recipe, that’s when you really know you’ve got them. The problem is, if you used the cheap store brand marinade for everything, having to admit that it wasn’t an old family recipe, but something that came out of a bottle off of the shelf

51 states

You would think that one or other political party would be pushing to add more states to the country to boost their representation in Congress and put a thumb on the scale of the elections, but the biggest lobby is, of course the flag manufacturing industry. After so many years of selling flags with 50 stars on them, they salivate at the idea of everyone replacing those flags with ones with 51 stars. I don’t think there’s any official design out yet. And whoever gets a contract will make millions, until the new Congress passes a massive tax on them.

Dodged a bullet

In the past four months, I’ve applied to a lot of jobs. I get ghosted by some and rejected outright by more. Sometimes I get screened by a recruiter, and maybe dozen times I’ve made it to the second round. I made it to one shortlist, but I had a power, Internet, and phone outage for half an hour when the interview was scheduled. It all came back and I messaged them about it, but they haven’t responded. If they don’t respond, I guess I dodged a bullet. I didn’t want to work for people who treat others like that.

Weekly Challenge #1055 – Dirty

The next topic is Beginning

LIZZIE

A guitar case and no guitar, plus a sleeping bag. A trip to the mountain gone wrong. The police searched everywhere. Nothing. One day, he was back, holding his guitar. The police asked him questions. “The guitar code was dirty again,” he said. “I planned to go to horse days.” Horse days? “Yes. A historical field trip, not this garbage.” The police had no clue what he meant, but they were offended. A nutcase, no doubt. The moment they tried to grab him, he held his guitar up and… disappeared. One wonders where he ended up on a corrupted code.

RICHARD

Dirty Words
I’d always thought our marriage was doing just fine.
Perhaps a little lacklustre, predictable, and – dare I say – at times, somewhat boring; but isn’t that the case for most couples after a few years?
It wasn’t good enough for my wife though. If things didn’t improve, the threat of marriage counselling was on the cards.
I didn’t fancy that, so I asked her for suggestions.
‘You could try talking dirty to me during sex’, she suggested.
So, I did… “The oven is filthy, the rubbish is overflowing and the floors need a good clean!”
We ended up in counselling anyway.

SERENDIPIDY

It was a dirty, rotten, evil trick to play.
The recorded message, posted in the mail.
I have your kids. I want a million dollars deposited into my Swiss bank account in seven days, every day over, one of the little darlings pays the price with their life.’
I included a recording of their screams and pleading for mercy, just to ram the message home.
The parents paid up, of course.
One million dollars, and well before the deadline.
Not that it made any difference whatsoever.
I’d already done away with the kids, on day one.
Noisy, annoying little buggers.

TOM

1054

Pathetic

OK, I don’t know how, but I miss-numbered the last story as 1052 instead of 1053. Pretty pathetic a septuagenarian can’t count to 1053. What can I say my mom fell down a staircase before I born. I had a forceps delivery by a Marine Doctor. Mix in dyslectic and ADHD. It’s a wonder they didn’t leave on the plain with pint of orange juice. Perhaps we should use roman numerals: MLIII. Or, binary: 10000011101. Go for all the marbles Hex-s: 41D. Nope mostly screw da up. Just got to own that pathetic thing. We do give effort award here?

1055

Dirty

Everyone has a dirty little secret. You know the one you share will ex crazy girlfriend. How years after you broke up sell it to National Eq. Yup and just after the one your senate primary. God I will there weren’t so many photos. Makes hard to push back. Some people might believe I would be impossible to do that will A dead Ferret. Trick is a live ferret. Only thing that can save me now as this sweet bit of OP-po. Dirty little secret of my esteemed rival has to do will a biker gang in Omaha. Ride-em cowboy.

NORVAL JOE

Even more surprising than Patrick’s remark was Bobbi when she charged toward her brother, her hands raised to throttle him. “You dirty bastard.”

Patrick grabbed her wrists before she could choke him, but she continued to shout. “You’re pathetic. You held Sabrina captive, torturing her until Billbert got there. Then you tried to use them to kill the Five Sisters Coven.

“You should be groveling, asking them for forgiveness, but instead you’re staring at Candy’s butt as she scrubs the counters. You should just leave. Now.”

Before Patrick could react, Mrs. Weinerheimer stepped in. “No. We need Patrick to stay.”

PLANET Z

My guidance counselor suggested I become an anchorite.
“Our previous achorite recently… graduated” he said.
They would wall me up at the school, feeding me through a hole and collecting waste from another.
“We tried using just one hole, but there were too many complaints.”
We went through the paperwork, signed the contracts, and the next day I was bricked over in an alcove by the library.
It’s a bit cramped, but I don’t worry about anything, really.
I’m fed, I’m never thirsty.
They add drugs to my food to deal with any itching.
And I never have to shower.

Wine review

Get your activated charcoal and insurance cards out! It’s time for another release from Totenkopf wineries. we recommend standing by at least 1 foot thick concrete barrier when uncorking this beauty. And if you’re holding your breath in anticipation, keep holding it until the fumes evaporate. With an acidic overtone that could dissolve a five dollar hooker in a bathtub in five minutes, this beauty pairs with fish, steak, and untold suffering easily. Certainly the finest selection available and death row wine cellars across every respecting banana republic. No customer will collect on the satisfaction guaranteed promise. Good luck, fools.

Bullfighter

Pablo wanted to be a bullfighter all of his life. On his deathbed, when asked if he had any regrets, he said I never fought the bulls. So the doctors and the nurses called a nearby farm and that evening sure enough they brought a bull to Pablo‘s room. It was a small bull and rather docile. They may have drugged it. Even so, getting it up the elevator wasn’t easy, the stairs were impossible. But there he was, Pablo hooked to so many machines and tubes and wires, finally face-to-face with a bull. He died of a heart attack.