Weekly Challenge #277 – Radio

Welcome to the 100 Word Stories podcast at podcasting.isfullofcrap.com. I’m your host, Laurence Simon.

This is Weekly Challenge Number Two Hundred and Seventy-Seven, where I post a topic and then challenge you to come up with a 100 word story based on that topic.

The topic this week was Radio

How about voting for your favorites?

[polldaddy poll=5413759]

Tom
Gideon
Thomas
Daniel
Danny
Steve
TerrazaByte
Norval Joe
TJ
Justin
Justin
Planet Z

And if you want to spam your social networks with this episode, use the Share buttons at the end of the post.


Tom

It was 1963 the president was dead, but it was the ramp-up to the
Christmas frenzy and all my thoughts were locked onto a 13 transistor six
diode Japanese work of wonder. It was jet black and ivory white with a
large transparent disk in the center engraved with frequency numbers.

Like Jean Shepherd’s Ralphy I had to wage a serious Christmas campaign to
get my transistor radio. There was the argument over hearing loss. The
argument over the corruption effect of rock and roll. Finally I cut a
deal to tune in to Bishop Fullton Sheen’s Sunday radio program

Gideon

I was listening to the radio this morning and heard an intriguing song.

The lyrics told the story of a man whose wife had turned her focus inward.

He started exploring and fell in love with someone else.

He left his wife.

His wife refocused on him and started stalking him.

This presented a conundrum for him – return to the renewed focus of his wife or stay with the focus of his new lover.

I never heard the outcome.

It was a country song and, in my mind, I kept hearing a tune about roadkill, so I turned it off.

Thomas P.

The radio plays all night. I wake often to a loud commercial, so I throw a towel or a pillow over the speaker to muffle it. Last night, I dropped my pillow on the radio and I heard a gasp. I couldn’t make out the words,
so I moved the pillow and heard a voice say: “You’ve got some gall! That’s not polite, and it’s quite unnerving. Don’t do that again. Just turn the radio down. No more tricks.” The rest of the night I lay awake
for hours wondering if I really heard what I thought I had.

———

The radio stood up straight next to the typewriter and proclaimed it had something to say, and that I had better put down what I was doing and pay attention.
“You have ignored me a long time, and I want you to know that you have missed a lot of good radio. You’ve missed Art Bell late at night, The Ron and Don Show,
George Noory on Coast to Coast, and the John Curley shows. If you want your mind to expand and keep it from turning into silly putty, turn off that damn TV, and turn me on.

Daniel

When the aliens finally made contact, it was because of a chance scan of our planet that revealed sentient life, which surprised them. They berated us for not trying to make contact ourselves. “Didn’t you have an interest in what’s beyond your own solar system?”

This outraged the scientific community. “We’ve been sending radio signals into space for decades! How could you not know we were here?”

The leader of the aliens’ diplomatic envoy was bewildered by this. “That’s weird. Let me check something… Huh. It seems your transmissions were being blocked by our spam filter. Go figure.”

Danny

Everything I ever had to know, I heard it on the Radio. We watch the shows, we watch the stars, on videos, for hours and hours. We hardly need to use our ears, how music changes throughout the years. Then pictures came, they broke my heart. Don’t care if Video Killed the Radio Star. Just turn it up, the Radio! I need the music, gimme some more! Cause all we hear is Radio Goo Goo, Radio Ga Ga! Let’s hope you never leave, my old friend. You had your time, you had the power, you’ve yet to have, your finest hour. Radio.

Steve

OUT radiating OUT reaching OUT grabbing mind and heart,

FORCING you to think and smile and wonder and laugh

You bob your head, body bouncing, MY MUSIC controls your motions

Your Emotions, too, are glued to me as I unveil you to yourself

You listen, riveted as you pray, you play, you do as I say

I inveigle multidimensionally – mind, will, and emotions stirred, shaken, broken and mended

At the SPEED OF LIGHT, delight runs ‘round the world

I am, AM, FM, longwave, shortwave, WiFi, satellite, STREAMING

Beaming into your world, forever entwined, your life and mine

I am Radio

Vince/TerrazaByte

Dr. Herman Hineschnickel has the world most exciting job. He’s in charge of the land based radio telescope for the SETI Institute, the Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence. His work day begins like most other jobs in America, with a cup of coffee and a quick review of the TPS reports.

But that all changes once he begins listing for evidence of life in the universe. With headphones on and keen eye on the frequency meter, he initiates this most exciting work. Hour 1 passes, nothing happens. Hours 2 & 3 go by, nothing happens. Hour 10, still nothing. Hours 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18…

NorvalJoe

Fly Paper Boy’s eyes shot open. The clock radio beside the bed blared a tire store commercial. He slapped the off button and the sound decreased a hundred decibels to a reasonable level.
“Five o’clock,” he moaned, “I just got to sleep. Jenny.”
He thought sleepily how his conniving sister messed with his alarm before.
The broadcast broke through his hazy thoughts and he was wide awake again.
” The home of Beaulla Larmpitt, Vinyl Man’s last murder victim, burned to the ground this morning. Police are looking for a white Toyota Corolla seen in the area only hours before…”

TJ

Martin’s father, Henry, was reading the business/metro section as
Martin sidled up behind him.

“So… I found the radio.”

Earlier, Martin had discovered an ancient shortwave radio in his
father’s workbench.

After several rounds of bluster, arguments and recriminations, Martin
could piece together what was behind his father’s nightly beeline for
the basement. Something about ongoing projects, corporate espionage,
dispatches to Japan– shortwave transmissions not leaving a data trail
the company could or would be tracking. The ethics bothered Martin, but
on some level he was relieved.

Later, chatting with his mistress, Henry appreciated his son’s
tendency to overthink everything.

Justin

While I love the experience of trying out a new phone; learning the menus and finding the latest apps, the reason for the new phone is annoying. I really liked the one I had before. It had adapted to me very well, and I’d gotten used to the nuances of the controls, it had my most used contacts memorized. Normally most of that is transferable, but not this time. I got a bad ear infection and the medicine killed the phone cells. My replacement plan allows for me to culture the latest generation in my ear canal, so I’m set.

Steven the Nuclear Man

Just the crackle-hiss-pop of solar radiation imitating breakfast cereal. Listening is dangerous – they might detect my radio, but I’ll risk one set.

A brief whistlescream from the speaker: the electromagnetic death whine of an orbital station. Damn aliens. They gated to the surface instead of coming through low earth orbit, but they’re making up for lost time.

The speaker comes fully alive. Some fool’s broadcasting the national anthem.

I listen, and turn on every radio in the place. I salute, wondering if they’ll vaporize me or the broadcaster first.

And I no longer care.

Planet Z

Funding for SETI projects was been drastically cut across the board.

So, we needed to take a new approach to survive.

It was on my drive through New York, listening to Howard Stern, that I got my idea…

That’s right. I am the world’s first shock-jock radio telescope disk jockey.

Me and my crew, The Morning Xenobiological Collection, fill the spectrum with interviews with topless interns, prank very long distance calls to quasars… all kinds of filth.

Our strategy is keeping us funded and searching, sure, but it comes at the cost of any intelligent life down here on Earth.

The Password

A man in a trench coat steps into the alleyway, walks down the steps, and knocks on a steel door.
A peephole slides open.
“What the password?” a voice growls.
“Mendicant,” whispers the man in the trench coat.
“Thank you,” growls the voice behind the door, and the peephole slides shut.
Somewhere in the building, a man at a computer terminal is drumming his fingers, waiting.
Another man runs into the room and says “Mendicant.”
The man at the terminal types in the new password. The screen confirms the input.
“I hate having to change these things every ninety days.”

Questions

Ned sent me a text message: “I have some questions.”
I sat down and waited for the questions to arrive.
One minute.
Two minutes.
Three minutes.
No questions.
Four hours later, still no questions.
I started to text back “What are the questions?” but I cleared the screen.
I’m not going to give in.
I’m not going to play this game.
If Ned has questions for me, he’ll ask them.
So I sit.
And wait.
What if Ned’s not responding because he’s in trouble?
Or lost?
Or hurt?
I sit there, worrying. Then, I text:
“I have some questions, too.”

The Lost God

Whuh, the God Of All Who Are Lost.
He has no priests, no followers, no temples.
Wander, traveler, and you are in the domain of Whuh.
The old bum, over there, under a crumpled, misfolded map as a paper hat, steering shopping cart full of broken GPS boxes, his chattering chorus of misdirection.
His eyes have seen many lands.
But he remembers none of them.
Do not ask him for directions.
Just walk. Walk in any direction.
You’ll find your way.
You’ll escape from the domain of Whuh.
The electronic chorus says TURN LEFT NOW.
The bum coughs and laughs.

Lord Foster’s Estate

Lord Foster’s estate is gigantic.
It is so large, by the time the man who mows the grass is done, the grass has grown back.
The groundskeeper asked for an additional man.
Lord Foster said no. The staff was large enough as it is.
The groundskeeper asked for a faster lawnmower.
Lord Foster said no. That lawnmower was fine for the job.
The groundskeeper asked if the lawmower could run at night.
Lord Foster said no. The noise was annoying.
So, the groundskeeper asked Lord Foster to come outside.
He tied him up.
And ran him over with the lawnmower.

Bacon Man

When Bacon Man
Has no bacon
He grabs a bottle
Of bacon-flavored syrup
Made by Torani
The syrup experts
And with his
Mighty fist
Twists off the cap
While cursing the world
For the lack
Of real
God’s-honest bacon
Within reach
“Where is my bacon?”
Shouts Bacon Man
“What is Bacon Man
Without bacon?”
Nobody answers
He stares
Angrily
At the bottle
Raises it
To his lips
And drinks
It’s not bacon
But it’s bacon enough
For Bacon Man
He drinks
And drinks
And drinks
Until the bottle
Is empty
Bacon Man belches
Drops the bottle
And sits there
Scowling

Mr. Eight Ball

Captain Infinity signed for the package, closed the door, and went into the kitchen for a boxcutter.
When he finally pulled out his new costume, he was horrified.
Black jumpsuit, white circle on the chest, and a golden 8 in the circle.
He dialed the customer service number on the invoice, and wasted the next 2 hours getting the run-around with the costume manufacturer and his credit card company.
The replacement wouldn’t arrive for two weeks.
He sighed, put on the costume, and met with the Avengers.
“Are we behind the Eight Ball today?” Iron Man sneered.
Captain Infinity fumed.

Weekly Challenge #276 – Falling

Welcome to the 100 Word Stories podcast at podcasting.isfullofcrap.com. I’m your host, Laurence Simon.

This is Weekly Challenge Number Two Hundred and Seventy-Six, where I post a topic and then challenge you to come up with a 100 word story based on that topic.

The topic this week was Falling

How about voting for your favorites?

[polldaddy poll=5364299]

Thomas
Gideon
Zackmann
Laina Ash
Tom
Daniel
Danny
Norval Joe
Justin
TJ
Planet Z

And if you want to spam your social networks with this episode, use the Share buttons at the end of the post.


Thomas

The temperature kept falling. I brought the dogs in, fed the iron stove, and sat in the big chair, pulling two woolen blankets over me. I thought of the pony and llamas in the barn. They must be freezing. I cleared furniture out of the way, and brought them indoors. Pretty soon, I had the chickens inside, along with the turkeys, two cats, and the boar. It was crowded and smelly, so I stepped outside for moment and the door clicked fast behind me. I could see them through the window, snorting and huffing and helping themselves to the pantry.

Gideon

Without thinking I replied “I adore you, I love you, I cherish you and I am slowly falling in love with you”.

She laughed, “I don’t think you are the type to ‘fall in love'”.

I thought a second.

“I think you are right – I don’t fall in love but I have been in love and I am slowly becoming in love”.

She asked “What’s the difference between falling and becoming?”

“Falling happens quickly – becoming happens slowly”.

A lightbulb appeared.

“Maybe it should be ‘I am slowly realizing that I am in love with you'”.

———————–

We have a new activity here at the nursing home, my new employer.
Joe has been retained to help reduce the recent increase in resident injuries.
His firm, Safety First, is considered the premier injury reduction firm in the area.
The class is called ‘Falling, Gracefully’, which teaches how to fall without injury, using many techniques taught to those studying judo.
The residents seem to enjoy the class but there does not seem to be a reduction in injuries.
One day they will find the correlation between my hire date, the rise in injuries and my joy in tripping people.

Zackmann

Jim was visiting a garden at the top of a skyscraper when a coconut feel out of a tree hitting Jim
on the head knocking him off the edge of the roof.
Jim took out his cell phone calling 911 saying “Help me! Im falling”
“Yes Mr Ling could you tell me how we can help you?”
“Im Not Pho Ling. Im falling as in plummeting off Simon Tower.”
Jim wishes the on hold song was not Lemon Demons Ive got Some falling to Do.
Landing in the back of a manure truck, Jim decides it unwise to speak further.

Laina Ash

No one ever wants to talks about falling into strange things. Like my co-worker Bill, one day he had the pure look of bewilderment so being nice (even though he steals my awesome creamer,) I asked what was wrong. Stuttering he answered, “I went to take a dip in my pool yesterday but I notice it didn’t look right. So in the process of a closer look I tripped and landed in my pool, but instead of water it was filled with tapioca pudding. It seems Bill Cosby finally snapped and went

Tom

Moriarty thought THIS IS the best the Master of Deduction can do! Pitched
off Reichenbach Falls to a certain rather indecorous death and he states
the absurdly overobvious. To Moriarty’s scrawl Holmes wryly smiles, grabs
the professor’s lapels, drives both hands against his chest, sends the
professor flying outward from the falls. In an equal opposite reaction
Holmes is driven deep within the waters. “Up impossible, down improbable,
out less then beneficial deduction states when all possibilities are
eliminated the only possibility was indeed: IN,” mused Holmes perched on
his rock ledge counting the seconds to Moriaty’s demise

Daniel

I’ve been falling for hours. Why haven’t I reached the bottom yet?

I remember climbing the mountain. A rumbling interrupted our attempt to make camp for the night. It was an avalanche. I ran, but found myself at the edge of a cliff. Desperately, I jumped.

I must’ve died. That’s the only explanation. Why else would I still be falling? This is hell…

The sun rises, and I can see land to my side. It takes me a moment to realize that what I’m seeing isn’t a cliff face, but the ground.

I haven’t been falling at all; I’m flying!

Danny

I woke up, should be a good thing, but I live on the 110 floor of the Empire State Building (truth be told, I squat there, need another 100 words to explain). Anyway, I step out of bed, now I’m falling rapidly towards 34th street. Moments from impact, I’m caught by none other than Mila Kunis! I look at her and scream “Oh my god, I love you as Meg on Family Guy!” Mila screams back at me, “How come nobody in Hollywood takes me seriously as a comedian!” I calmly reply, “Maybe it would help if you put some pants on.”

Norval Joe

“No way he’s falling for this,” Fly Paper Boy thought. He slouched down in his seat and faked asleep. It was 2am, he was out on bail, and parked in front of Vinyl Man’s late mother-in-law’s house.
“Jimmy Thompson,” the officer said, “Haven’t seen you in years. What are you doing so far from home?”
“Oh. Mr., I mean, Officer Dinkman,” the boy said. “I stayed too late at a friends, and got sleepy driving. I’m better now.”
“Tell your parents hello,” Dinkman said as Fly Paper Boy drove away from the house where $1,000,000 lay buried under the porch.

Justin

The Carnival of Esoteric Wonders came into town, and Harold walked to the spectacle, fully reliant on his cane. He knew the time of his long, contented life was nearly up, but he’d never been to a magic show before, so he went to see Chroniac the Amazer. When Chroniac asked for a volunteer, Harold raised his hand, and was chosen. Harold got into the black box, and felt the sensation of falling. When it opened, he was a teenager. He tossed the cane away and cried out ‘Dadgummit! I don’t want to have to go through this again!’

TJ

Had you asked Martin why he was so interested in being a spy, he’d be
hard pressed to say. He was feeling a bit hidebound, perhaps. The
relationship dramas of his fellow classmates bored him and after he got
his real driver’s license he realized he was still too young to go
anywhere. He enjoyed his permit training with his dad, and thought maybe
a more mature perspective would bring them closer together. But his
father never approved of his freelance spy training. And when a secret
panel fell open on his dad’s workbench, he suddenly knew why that was.

Planet Z

I wake up.
I open my eyes.
It’s cold. It’s dark.
I’m laying on a bench
Looking up.
Branches. Dark skies.
Snow is falling.
It is beautiful.
I feel it on my face.
Cold. Melting. Wet.
Blinking it out of my eyes.
I open my mouth
It’s covered. Taped shut.
I reach and
I can’t move my arms
Or legs
Tied to the bench?
I can’t move.
I shake, I yell
Nothing.
I can’t move. I can’t make a noise.
I can’t roll off.
I open my eyes.
It is cold. It is dark.
Snow is falling.
It is terrifying.

The Killing Stone

Ever kill two birds with one stone?
It’s not that hard to do, really.
Especially if they’re chickens. Bashing in their heads with a stone is really easy.
In fact, if you’ve got them trapped in the coop, you can pretty much wipe out the whole flock with one stone.
Dropping a large paving stone on a bamboo cage full of finches or parakeets will take out half a dozen easily.
Ostriches are another case entirely. Those, you have to wait until they’re asleep, and take really careful aim before hitting them.
Otherwise, they’ll kill one human with one kick.

The Gallery

Art thieves hit the gallery last night, stealing every painting out of their frames.
The owner of the gallery called the police, and then called the insurance company.
No answer.
The cops looked at the insurance policy.
“Oh, it’s from that company,” they said. “We busted them last month. It’s worthless.”
The gallery owner panicked and looked around…
The frames! The frames are still there!
He called his engraver and worked up new signage that showcased the ornate frames the thieves left behind.
Their avant-garde show “Focus On The Frame” was a success.
Until the dastardly frame thieves showed up.