Category: Andrew Ian Dodge

Andrew Ian Dodge returns with a tricky dilemma…

“…Define a dilemma then Sage ole boy? If you don’t think killing a horde of Deep Ones by blowing up most of a town or not, is one?” Rupert queried over his pint.
The Sage paused briefly. He spoke warmly to his friend and colleague. “What would you do if had a choice between turning back a Great Old One for a few more centuries or having a significant chance of helping to stop 100s of deaths from a suicide bomber?
Rupert, normally rapid in response, sat stunned.
“I had to make that call with minutes to spare. Tough innit?”

Finally, an angst-filled monologue from Andrew Ian Dodge…

Problems, We all got problems
You’ve got more than most
When it comes to complaining
You really push out the boat
Where d’you get off
Giving me all this shit
The smallest little crime
You turn into a right little bitch
It makes me stop and wonder
Why I keep you in my life
You got shit – deal with it
Don’t keep it all inside
I’ll help you if you ask me
Just quit messing with my mind
Your emotions are so wild
You minds a total mess
You can’t turn back the tide
And it really gets me stressed

I’m smelling song here…

Andrew Ian Dodge shares a little showbiz news…

After the downer tale of yesterday and the described idiocy of the previous 100 words… I am going a bit goofier. I have got two bits of show-biz news you lot might not have heard yet. One…the horrid news that pneumatic breasted Jordan and her one hit wonder Aussie husband, Peter “Insania” Andre are planning an album of duets. NO! On the other hand Take That fans will be pleased to hear Robbie Williams will rejoin the group for their forthcoming tour. He previously said that he wasn’t going to join his former group-mates on their nostalgic panty-squirt inducing tour.

Since when was this the E! Channel?

Everything’s okay with Kim, right, Andrew?

The end of a serious relationship does a rather heavy job on your being. It brings to mind that you go through the four basic elements of nature. The first one is fire in the form of your pained rage. Then there is the wind in your screaming emotional outbursts. The water element raises its head in the fact you feel all your plans are now wet and useless. And finally you come back to earth and realise that you can move on; get on with the rest of your life. Remember this wisdom the next time you get dumped.

Andrew Ian Dodge takes on a tax-and-hide RINO today…

Sen Olympia “elect me cause my first husband died and I am Greek” Snowe wants to tax internet phone calls. She is so wrong on so many levels its almost hard to contemplate. First of all it would be almost impossible to do this, secondly it would probably just deny Mainers a chance to use it, there are probably easy ways round anything they come up with and finally how the hell do you tax something that is free! Of course, this is not surprising behaviour from the notorious “Republican only when she really has to be.” What a nitwit.

Professors are the same everywhere, it seems…

A professor at Chester University has declared the 7/7 attacks as primarily an extreme form of demonstration”. They were basically expressing their religious rage and not actually just being evil terrorists. He also said that to refer to the attacks as terrorism risked “demonising” those involved. My beloved Kim said: “well, of course, he would say that he lives in bloody Chester!” I do rather hope the offspring of some 7/7 victim finds this prat and knocks him on his idiotic arse. One does have to think that he is just trying to get some press. Lets hope its negative.

Andrew Ian Dodge sucks to me and my COTV heroics today…

As some of you might have heard the Carnival of the Vanities has a bit of a row going on. As with last time someone acted the prat and decided not to post all entries our lad Laurence did an Avignon edition. Avignon is where the alternate Pope was based when the Catholic Church was having one of its many rows. I don’t quite understand why people take it upon themselves to act a teet and go against the entire ethos of the CoTV. Its people who lack the understanding of the word Vanity. Let’s hope it ain’t its deathnell.

Andrew Ian Dodge may be in Jolly Old England, but he still looks back to the Sport Of The King Of Beers every now and then…

Murray and I have come up with t-shirts for NASCAR loving mates. The T-shirts are inspired by a piece of idiocy as found by LGF. It seems that NBC wanted to prove that NASCAR fans are a bunch of racist knuckle dragging redneck morons. They seemed to be keen to do whatever is necessary to make their case ala those types at CBS. I am guessing whomever came up with this scheme never heard of New Hampshire Motorspeedway. This was in part done in memory of my fave NASCAR fan Mommabear. She would have been a bit peeved for sure.

Andrew Ian Dodge learns the agony of defeat…

The L’Affaire England, Please Lose It has ended unsatisfactorily for Growing Old Disgracefully. You see Virgin Radio had a bit of contest to pick an A & B-side of a world Cup charity single. A side was meant to be a pro-England footie and B anti-World Cup/footie. Well it seems what they didn’t tell us was that the b-side was suppose to be shite. We didn’t realise this; GoD submitted an anti-footie love song. Instead of telling us it was not appropriate; the bastards have “lost” the track which I hand-delivered to their London offices. What a bunch of wankers.

Andrew Ian Dodge looks at the leader of the CONSERVATIVES with… less than hope.

Recently David Cameron, Tory leader, has called UKIP a bunch of fruitcakes, loonies and closet racists. Now considering that UKIP is made up of lots of former Conservative voters and potential future ones it is amazingly stupid to be so beastly about the anti-EU party. If he thinks he can ditch the right (no the BNP is not right they are national socialists) and merely get elected via the middle road he is a bigger fool than I ever believed him to be. Let’s hope that Dan Hannan can talk some sense into Cameron next time he sees him.