The Wacky Adventures of Abraham Lincoln 71

Every now and then Abraham Lincoln did the grocery shopping.
It was an act of self-preservation, since Mary Todd had a habit of picking up asparagus and pig knuckles.
Abe wanted chicken for dinner, so he bought a dozen eggs and brought them back home to the White House.
“You want eggs?” asked Mary Todd. “Scrambled? Boiled?”
“No, I want chicken,” said Abraham.
“They won’t be ready for months,” said Mary Todd. “We’re having scrambled eggs.”
“We shall sooner have the fowl by hatching the egg than by smashing it,” said Lincoln.
Mary Todd smashed the eggs in Abe’s face.