Welcome to the Weekly Challenge Number One Hundred And Fifteen, where I post a topic and then challenge you to come up with a 100 word story based on that topic.
The topic this week was selected by Steven the Nuclear Man, and we went with Exam.
The excellent theme music is by Guy David
VOTING
Go ahead and listen to them and then vote for your favorites (multiple selections are allowed):
TOM
The last eight undergrads hovered near the TA. Only two of them would by merit of the final exam be fasttracked into Stanford”s master program. Professor Marquette wasn”t on campus but the old man”s presence dominated the Art complex. His finals were brutal 600 to 1000 question an all day affair frown on by administration but gladly endured by the student body. Ruby handed out the bound envelopes with the test. To the horror of the codray a single sheet of paper with a single line of type.
Takashi Murakami”s My Lonesome Cowboy art or not?
JOHN B
The dampening field was playing havoc with my cochlear implant. You would think the Bar would be more trusting of it”s future paying members. The #2 pencil/transmitter was barley getting my signal out. Three days of trying to gleam answers through the static was driving me crazy. Last night I thought I had figured out a work around, but now I realized I should have spent the time studying orbital property rights, or getting a stronger amp. However, after two prior legitimate attempts, I needed an edge. This time I was going to pass and become an honest lawyer.
JEFFREY
The exam meant the difference between freedom and life long imprisonment. The problem, no one knew what it was. So we stood there in line and waited our turn while our imaginations ran wild. I watched men as hard as rocks melt, blubbering before the questioner. In all my time in the line I had only seen one person volunteer for the test. The door opened and shut, and he was gone.
Then it was my turn, “Take the exam?”
“Yes.” he point to the door.
As it shut behind me a voice said. “You are free to go.”
ELLY
I”d been dreading and looking forward to this day since I had turned sixteen. Sleep the night before, I made sure wasn”t an option thanks to my insanely expensive 13 shot venti soy hazelnut vanilla cinnamon white mocha with extra white mocha and caramel drink. I obsessively studied over the driving manual like my Grandma and her monthly subscription of TV guide. Keeping, in mind not to miss anything really important, I hadn”t realized how deadly of a mix my drink was and on the morning of the exam, I ended up in the emergency room instead of the DMV.
THOMAS
Marshall stood before the searing gaze of the Pyrogenic Magus Council. He had tested twice and failed, this time he had to pass. He needed to be a pyromancer. He spread his arms. His hands blackened and fused, (proof of his earlier failures), burst into flames. He worked the twelve forms of the Incendiary Codec, with ease. A smile passed over the half of his face that still had muscle control, after acing the oral examination. Grimacing, he started the Technique du Mastere. Marshall formed a majestic golden flaming serpent, which coiled around Marshall reducing him to ash. Three strikes…
GUY DAVID
It was time for our exam. Our teacher seated himself and watched silently, patiently as we snuggled and kissed, preparing ourselves. I slowly slipped my hand down, to fast? Our teacher was stoned faced. I couldn’t discern from his expression if I was going the right way, so I continued down my partner’s body looking for the right spots. She moaned. I found it. Clothes started shedding, as we got more and more excited. We forgot our teacher and dove into ecstasy.
Much later, when we where completely relaxed in the afterglow, our teacher said we did well. We passed.
POND NITELY
Max whistled tunelessly to himself, grinning as he leapt over the bike rack and raced up the stairs.
“I’m home!!” he shouted, throwing his knapsack on the couch and settling in front of the TV. “Those losers” he thought to himself. Scottie and Jimbo were still at school, for a study session for the exam. Pfft. Max had used his after school time more wisely weeks ago; the cupboard doorlock was easy to pick, a quick snick with his cell, and all the multiple choice answers were his!
It hadn’t even beeen that hard to memorize the answers; ABADCADAFABFADABADDADAACC; piece of cake. Maybe best to get one or two wrong, just to be safe.
The next morning Max winked at his buddies as the papers were being handed out, face down. He picked up his pencil smiling…A.B.A.D… ” Alright class, you may begin.” Max flipped his paper and stared, his face falling as he read: For this year’s exam, please compose a one hundred word narrative on the following topic: “What would you do if you found yourself face to face with a dragon and all you had was a boyscout handbook and a piniata costume?”
STEVEN THE NUCLEAR MAN
She collects the fee from the nightstand. He rubs his ring finger,
counting ribs as her shirt slides over them.
“I gotta run,” she says. “I have a exam in biology to study for.”
“I had an exam at the hospital yesterday,” he blurts.
She giggles. “What grade did you get?”
He remembers the scan full of unexpected metastatic dots.
“They don’t give grades.” He hopes his smile seems natural.
After she leaves, he rolls upright, lights a cigarette – why stop now?
– and stares at the door. He opens the nightstand drawer, removes the
book, and desperately begins to cram.
EVA MOON
She stood in his office, looking hopeful and impossibly young, exam clutched in her hands.
“Professor Newman, I just can’t fail this class.” When he didn’t respond, she leaned provocatively over the desk, “I’d to anything for a A,” she breathed.
He leaned back in his chair and steepled his fingers, “Anything?”
A sly smile far beyond her years curled her lips. “Anything.”
“Try studying.”
In an instant the smile turned sour.
After she left he tapped her name into the university computer, out of curiosity.
Last quarter’s grades: C-, C, D, A
He laughed. The A was in Ethics.
ALMO
James stood bare-chested and barefoot in front of the monk.
The snow turned his feet nearly purple. A dark, angry wound glared red from his shoulder. He neither shivered nor flinched.
His eyes were red-rimmed and his skin was loose, showing the effects of the monthlong test of solitude on the harsh mountain.
“You have done well phyi rgyal,” the monk said flatly, using the Tibetan word for foreigner. “All that is left is the written exam. You will be one with our spirit.”
“Exam?” James said incredulously. “Screw this. I’m not taking any written test. Those things are hard.”
CALEB
Mr. Johnson it”s a good thing you finally came in for your exam. You know Prostate Cancer kills a handful of men each year. Now there”s nothing to be alarmed about. I”m going to demonstrate the whole procedure before we begin. First you”ll pull down your pants like this and then bend over. Now you reach back and take each cheek in one hand and pull. Now do you see how open that is? You can see Tierra Del Fuego from here. See? It”s ok to look.
Now you just take one of these and then”
Hey come back here!
JUSTIN
Ok, let’s see here, a podcast where anyone can submit a 100 word
story. Hmm, an entry exam? Let’s see… Can you count to one hundred?
Yes. Do you have a computer microphone? Yes. If no, go buy one you
cheap jerk! Rude… Check all that apply: Are you Sick, demented, a
zombie, have a hard to pronounce name, or tasteless. Uh… One more.
What would you do if you were face to face with a dragon and all you
had was… what the crap? Heck with this. Maybe I’ll try ipodjacker
podcast. Maybe it’s not done by a retard.
JERRY D
“Mr. White.”
“Yes.”
“Mr. White, are you ready?”
“Yes.”
“Mr. White, did you bring with you a number two pencil?”
“Yes, I brought two of them just in case, and please, call me Jerry.”
“I am so sorry, Mr. White, you score will be reduced by 15% for not following instructions”
“What do you mean 15%, that’s not fair!”
“Mr. White, you were given full and complete instructions.”
“You were to bring one number two pencil.”
“One more infringement of the instructions and you will be dismissed with a grade of zero.”
“Mr. White.”
“Yes.”
“Why are you naked?”
Scream……….
ANIMA
Carl worked the women alone, especially the pretty ones. They couldn’t talk back, or complain” Outside, the sun was setting”
“Jayne Doe, Caucasian female, aged 25 to 30”
“Skin, pallid and cool, “Cause of death” Possible exsanguination? ” No apparent gross body injury .”
“Lovely”, he murmured, stroking her marble white cheek.
“Heh” small puncture wound on the neck” make that 2″
With the jab of the measuring probe, Elenas’ eyes flash open. She grabs the examiner, dragging him near.
“So you like dead girls? Exit solus, dear doctor.” she thinks, sinking her razor sharp teeth into his neck.
PLANET Z
The call is full of static. I barely hear the account and password, but after a few tries I type them into the system and look up his trouble ticket.
“What does this ‘exam’ mean?” he says in a thick Arabic accent. “Why broken?”
I swear, I can hear… gunfire?
“It’s ‘exim’ not ‘exam,'” I say. “cPanel uses exim as a mail handler.”
“I know not comptuers!” he shouts “We pay you! Fix it! Fix it no-”
I hear an explosion, and the line goes dead.
Goddamned terrorist.
I guess that fucker didn’t know the safe handling of explosives either.