Maple is murder

Some say that veal is wrong because it’s cruel.
Same with foie gras, hamburgers, and lobster.
But when you hand me imitation pancake syrup instead of pure maple syrup, that’s where I draw the line.
Tapping maple trees isn’t cruelty. It’s a kindness.
Maple trees store energy as sap. The colder it gets, the more sap they store, and it causes painful bloating.
The local native tribes sensed this pain, and tapped the trees to relieve the pressure.
In the process, they came up with a sweet, tasty snack.
On the other hand, maple wood furniture is just downright vicious.