John
The anniversary gifts proved telling…
1 paper: that marriage certificate, so final.
2 cotton; that stuff I learned to stuff in my ears to get by.
3 leather; handy to spice up sex night.
4 silk: ends up she’d rather look elegant to women competitors.
5 wood; the consequent hopeful turgor of my member.
6 iron: as in ironing; my fun weekends.
7 wool: the stuff you pull over your eyes when she’s gettin saggy.
8 bronze: what I casted the carcass of that miserable dog in.
9 pottery: more attic stuff.
10 tin: where I tossed that marriage certificate before alimony was for life.