You think life is so good on Easy Street?
Well, you fool, I own a house on Easy Street, and life’s not so good.
Any window that’s not boarded-up is broken.
Half of the streetlights are out. The rest have been knocked over.
Stripped cars up on blocks, or sitting out on the curb.
Nobody comes around to pick up the trash. Mountains of trash.
Rats and vermin everywhere.
Naked children splashing in mosquito-ridden muddy puddles.
Disgusting.
Thank God I don’t actually live there.
I just own that house to establish residency in that ward for my city alderman job.