Odd Noises

“There’s odd noises coming from under the bed,” said my wife.
I rubbed my eyes. “It must be Nardo and Piper.”
“Meow.” “Meow.”
Both Nardo and Piper were on the blanket.
“Or not.”
“Will you please look?” my wife asked. “I don’t like odd noises.”
“Fine,” I said. I leaned over the side and looked.
A dwarf was tucked up under the bed, reading from a calculator: “Three… five… seven… nine…”
“Can you please stop it with the odd noises?” I asked him.
He nodded. “Two… four… six… eight… ten…”
I pulled back up on the bed. “How’s that, dear?”