The cave was meant as a lark. I convinced the kids that I was going to dig the hole so deep that when I came out the other side, I would be in China. My youngest, a smart little shit, said if I dug down straight I’d come out someplace in the Indian Ocean, so I had better angle the hole a bit. This took the fun out of my little prank, so I just dug a hole deep enough to bury some junk I had in the garage and all the incriminating stuff inside my safe in the den.
They invited me for a day of spelunking West of here. They said it would be an easy day, with no water traps or streams to contend with. It was an invitation offered by my church group. I haven’t been afraid of tight spaces, heights, darkness, and bugs since my divorce, so I looked forward to the adventure. I put fresh batteries in my headlamp, grabbed some more gear and was on my way to Gardner Cave. Again, I reminded myself that wrestling myself through tight, wet, cracks in the semi-darkness was something I left behind a long time ago.
Teenie Parker’s husband spent hours in his man cave, watching sports on a large TV, and mixing drinks made at his built-in bar. Teenie stumbled on photos of “she-sheds” online. She wanted one of her own. She sheds have become the female response to man caves. She saved, and had one built in the backyard. The new shed was fitted with solar heating, a small bath, and comforting wood stove. Teenie spent more and more time in it, and grew to love it so much, she moved out of the main house, and divorced her cold spouse in the process.