Bruce Wayne was a drunk.
Alfred would shake him awake, wipe the vomit off of his face, and say “Batsignal.”
“Fuck,” growled Bruce, and Alfred would help him get into his Batman suit.
He added an autopilot to the Batmobile because he was too drunk to drive it.
He also added a minibar, because wanted to get drunker.
When the Batmobile arrived at the scene of the crime, Batman would fall out of it, growl a few times, and then punch the hell out of anything in his way.
Then he’d swing by the liquor store, and head back home.
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Now, unlike all that DC crap, this is a movie I would actually want to see!
s. x