Evil people sneak into Jewish cemeteries and spraypaint swastikas on the headstones, or they kick them over, or both.
I, for one, will not stand for this.
Instead of a typical headstone, I will commission a rounded obelisk in the shape of an inflatable punching bag doll.
But made of heavy granite.
Whenever someone tries to kick it over, it will wobble back, possibly clonking the aggressor on the face, or rolling over their toes.
It would sway and dance any time there’s heavy winds or an earthquake.
Or, maybe, I’ll just get cremated and thrown in their Nazi faces.