Buford saw on the news that there was a rare type of coffee that sold for hundreds of dollars a pound.
It came from beans eaten by a species of jungle cat that were then excreted and gathered up by farmers.
Buford went to the shelter, picked up a dozen tomcats, and brought them home.
Then he filled up some bowls with coffee beans and locked them all up in a room.
“Eat, you fuckers!” he shouted.
Needless to say, Buford’s bold new business venture went under rather quickly.
“Maybe I should have washed them turds off first?” he mumbled.