The cure for

We distributed the pills throughout the world along with the directions.
A lot of people swallowed the pills. And died.
I guess they didn’t read directions.
You’re supposed to crush them up in olive oil and spread them on the back of your hand for slow absorption.
Some people spread them over their arms or their chest.
They died.
More people died from various abuses and misuses of the pills.
Only if you followed the directions did you get the awesome high from it.
What? You thought this was a vaccine for the Corniavirus?
Nah. It’s a cure for stupid.