When life hands you… potatoes?

When life hands you lemons…
Well, life didn’t hand me lemons.
Life handed me potatoes.
Am I supposed to squeeze them and make potatoade?
Hell no. That sounds gross, potatoade.
Nobody wants that.
Maybe I’ll load my potato gun and fire it at them, the people who gave me potatoes.
Maybe I’ll make a potato-powered clock.
And count down the time until the next person gives me potatoes.
Or just a big potato battery, wires and nails in a long chain.
And the next time someone comes to give me potatoes, I’ll wire it to the doorknob.
Come on in!