The next topic is All our tomorrows
RICHARD
Beans
I has beans every day, plenty of fibre in them, see. Scientists say it’s good for you, all I knows is they makes me fart.
Guess that’s a good thing though: better out, than in, I says, just so long as you ain’t downwind of me at the time.
Ferocious, they are… pungent!
But, I suppose that’s one of the downsides of taking care of your body, occupational hazard, you might say.
Of course, if I’m honest, it’s not strictly true. I’m not really health conscious at all.
I just loves my beans, with a passion.
And farting, of course.
SERENDIPIDY
Just because we’ve been around for millennia, don’t write us off. It doesn’t mean that we’re a bunch of has-beens.
Even the forces of evil have to evolve with the times, otherwise how else are we going to stay relevant and a force to be reckoned with?
Why do you think social media is so toxic, and there’s so much disagreeable content online? As for the Dark Web, we invented it!
One thing we won’t touch though is artificial intelligence. We prefer to leave it well alone.
Because we simply can’t have AI taking over the world.
That’s our job!
LISA
Why Are We Here?
“After the death of our parents, we partied. We partied pretty hard. We travelled. We travelled far and then returned here to the only house we’ve ever known feeling like has-beens.
Thirty years old, stinking rich, and feeling like life had nothing left to offer us.
It’s ludicrous, isn’t it?”
He’d spoken for ages. The sofa, despite its softness, was feeling more uncomfortable than the basement. I felt I had to say something. My speech felt slurred when I spoke and the room felt a little blurry.
“Where exactly do we fit in to this idea for a new community?
LIZZIE
The train station was still there. The door was locked. I peered through the window but couldn’t see anything. The bike was rotting away at the usual place. The windsock was still flapping on the rusty pole. Back then I didn’t understand why the station master wanted that windsock up there. Trains don’t run on wind. The old station master would smile and say that the birds needed to know. But I never saw any birds. The station master would smile again and say, you don’t? Look. And point to the sky. He saw birds, and that made me smile.
TOM
Cold Fusion
In the land of the has beens is a tiny corner set aside for the never was-s. Rudy was in charge of this sad clump of lost souls. To be a has been you got to have been a been. Done something of at least marginal success. The never was-s came so close to that level, but just couldn’t get their head above the waters of failure. Rudy kept track of each “C-list” personality in an ever-growing ledger. Rudy got this gig after losing the Noble Prize seven times. I can’t quite remember what was his contribution to physics.
858
Millions of Arrows
I am a fan of Japanese director Akira Kurosawa. After the war he set out to make films that would explain the American and European mindset. Seven Samurai was basically a western. Throne of Blood was a retelling of Shakespeare’s Macbeth. In the over-the-top climax Generals Washizu played my Toshiro Mifune is driven mad by the trees of Spider’s Web Forest “they have risen to attack us” he screams. A direct nod to Birnam Wood. What follows is millions of Arrows. End of the Magnificat Seven doesn’t hold a candle to Mifune’s pitching about like a human pin cushion.
NORVAL JOE
Initially, everyone who passed Billbert sitting against the wall asked him what he was doing there. Hours later they all acted like he was invisible or just ignored him like he was some embarrassing has-been.
Ten minutes before the end of visiting hours, a nurse opened the door. “Okay, Billbert. You have ten minutes. Then you need to leave.”
Sabrina lay as still as death in a yellow hospital gown. Her injured leg was exposed with wicked looking rods and apparatuses piercing the flesh. A monitor beeped regularly, displaying her heart rate and respirations.
Billbert took her hand in his.
PLANET Z
I used to be a big podcaster.
But back then, podcasting was really small.
And everybody knew everyone else.
Then, podcasting got big.
Big people got into podcasting.
If you were big before, well, you either hitched your wagon to these big people, or you got lost in the crowd.
You either had to do more and more outrageous things for attention, or you just learned to accept the fact that you were always a small fish, it’s the pond that changed.
And I’m okay with that, because in the end, every fish ends up drinking every other fish’s piss.