The Lever

For Archimedes’ birthday, we all chipped in and got him a lever.
“Is it long enough to move the world?” we asked him.
“It’s looks long enough,” he said, holding it in his hands. “Let’s find out.”
Archimedes put it down, spat into his hands, and rubbed them together. Then, he picked the lever back up and began to dig it into the ground with all of his might.
“Can you feel the world moving?” asked Archimedes.
Just then, an earthquake struck Athens. Many were killed.
For the safety of all, the lever was melted down into various homoerotic trinkets.