Ken Oyster

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Andrew Ian Dodge comes back from a weekend with another fine story about life in London:

Today I got back from a lovely weekend with my girlfriend, Kim. Alas, there was one downside. I had to pay £3 for a one way ticket within Zone 1-2. The last time I did this it was £2.20. In other words our lovely socialist terrorist-loving Mayor has managed to increase fares way over inflation. It is patently obvious that he thinks anyone using the tube at peak times is obviously rich. Would it surprise you to hear Ken wants us to all have Oyster cards which allow the London Underground to track your every move? Big brother Ken methinks.

And yet it’s George Galloway on Big Brother?

Bumfight

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More political insight from our friend across the pond, Andrew Ian Dodge

Five blokes are itching to lead their party or at least their version of the party. What party you might ask? Well this time it’s the Liberal-Democrats turn to pick a new leader after their previous one fell for being an chronic alky. Political hacks & addicts will have noted that there are two clear parts of the party who are not just divided by a hyphen. As the race moves on all five of these men attempt to be everything to all members but at the same time reassuring their “base”. Who will fall off the leadership tightrope first?

Oh well. There goes my hope of his Friday Catpodcasting.

Mainiac

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Andrew Ian Dodge looks at Maine and finds the fignerprints of one of the biggest maniacs on the planet…

In the bizarre world that is North America, and no I don’t mean Canuckland, the Maine governor has signed a deal with Hugo Chavez of Venezuela to provide cheap oil. Now Maine is not the slightest bit up in arms about its Governor sucking up to an anti-semite, anti-American socialist dictator. Chavez, routinely rhetorically supports America’s enemies and is a good buddy of Fidel Castro. There are other states in the snow belt who have been offered the deal. They all refused. And where are Maine’s Senators on this? The outrage? Mainiacs are seriously in trouble if they are not incensed.

We here in Texas will go back to horses and saddles before touching Chavez’s charity.

Galloway

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Hey, folks! It’s time for some more excellent musings from Andrew Ian Dodge. Let’s check in with his favorite apologist for Saddam and the Syrians…

George Galloway, Hamas, er I mean RESPECT MP for Bethnal Green & Bow is currently doing celebrity Big Brother. He claims he is doing it to raise “issues” with a larger audience that aren’t normally engaged in politics. Now his constituents have taken exception to him farting around in a house with Denis Rodman and a transvestite 80’s pop star; when he should be representing their interests in the House of Commons…which their taxes pay him for. Now are they being ever so unreasonable? Even better his fee is going to a terrorist front; according to the US State Department.

Right on the button, as always!
You can catch Andrew Ian Dodge at all the sites under the squiggly squirmy Cthulhu icon.

Kennedy

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Andrew sent me this one a few days ago about some drunk British politician or something. I’m a little drunk from Kennealy’s and four pints, so pardon me if I just step out of the way and wake up tomorrow to fix the code for this…

Charles Kennedy is fond of the bottle; unfortunately he was fond of being leader of the Liberal Democrats as well. He refused to admit he was addicted to Whisky so he has lost his party’s top job in Westminster. He never admitted he was alcoholic to himself, to his party or his voters. They all found out they were duped and turned on him sharply. His leadership was stumbling towards disaster and his end was inevitable. Now the party has to decide a new leader exposing the fact that Social Democrats and Liberals shouldn’t really be in the same party.

I really need a nap, but the bird keeps singing outside my window, dammit!

The Stripes Bar

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Sort of a diary entry in 100 words from Andrew Ian Dodge today…

It started out as a kind offer from a rock band friend of Growing Old Disgracefully. We were to have our official live debut playing a few tunes acoustically as “special guests”. It would be a great way to dip our musical toes in the live scene. The dipping seems to have become a plunge. The opening band has pulled out and we are now the openers. We will play as many as we can get rehearsed. I, for one, can’t wait to get out there; getting stage fright afterwards as I always do. So Stripes Bar here we come!

I’m hoping for bootleg recordings.

Your Glow

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I’m going to need to set up a category for Andrew, I think.
Here’s his latest, which is kind of a poem and a song, too…

That glow you have
Like from my nano
Lights up my days
Lettin’ me know, I ain’t alone
You’re there as a lead
Through my life’s toils
Standing me in good stead
Helping me through my many foils
Like the iPod’s many tunes
You are a soundtrack to my life
Guiding me through the dunes
Helping things through strife
You plugged into my heart
A line of power to my soul
Getting to me like a sharp dart
Music to my hurting ears
One that technology can’t provide
There to prevent all those tears
Letting me know where to hide

And if any of you out there have your own stories you’d like to start publishing here or elsewhere, let me know and I’ll be glad to pass the word along to the tiny sliver of the world that listens to my little feed.

Adolf Chavez

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It’s a hard-hitting rant in 100 words by Andrew Ian Dodge for your enlightenment and concern today…

In the country called Venezuela they have a leader who continues to echo one from the past.
This leader came from Austria and led a greater Germany; his evil is legendary. His politics were socialist in a nationalist way, and he believed Jews were the greatest enemy to all mankind.
Despite his crimes, there are leaders who ape his policies.
Mr Chavez is one such man. He likes to think he is the new Che; but in fact he is closer to the new Fuhrer.
First Venezuela, now Bolivia and where to next?
Oh never-mind nothing to worry about right?

Technically, he calls them the “Christ-killers” in his speech.
I didn’t realize the Romans controlled the world these days. Did you?
Anyway, now that Andrew’s going to be a regular feature here, I’ve added a section there on the right margin to list his many projects and sites. Just scroll down a bit past the wiggly Cthulhu icon thing.

Shutdown

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Another fine tale from Andrew Ian Dodge, inspired by the shutdown of the London Transit System over New Year’s.

There was a group of men who thought they were clever; by shutting down the London Underground on New Years Eve. They ruined the night for many of their fellow Londoners; but probably expected sympathy. And annoyed a few more with their heartless smugness. In the coming year they will suffer much abuse and no doubt wonder why.
And those people who would normally be upset seeing an RMT member verbally abused will probably look away. There will no doubt even be some cheers.
The union member will probably not realise what they have wrought with their heartless holiday endeavor.

Cowering

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A young man sat cowering in his London flat, fearing for his life.

You see, he was a thrusting blogger who took his belief in free speech just a mite too far. For some.

The lad use his newfound voice, having been a a bit sheepish before to launch into a scathing critique of Islam and Mohammed.

His rants grew more biting, until he recorded a nice little kitty about the Quran.

He was praised all over, from New Zealand to Russia. His admirers however would not protect him from the angry mob outside, the ones yelling Allah Ackbhar!