Glaciers and Teeth

Despite having insurance, I hadn’t gone to the dentist in ten years.
My gums bled.
And chunks of tartar flaked off like icebergs falling off of glaciers.
Finally, I went to get my teeth checked after a large chunk came loose, making me think I’d broken a tooth.
Four cleanings and a lot of blood later, my teeth have changed shape, and I am constantly probing and licking that area.
I can’t stop. It’s maddening.
So, I wear a mouthguard. I don’t talk.
And I brush constantly. Religiously.
I’m sure I’m wearing my teeth down.
I lick that spot again.

Timing Is Everything

The new iPhone will be available next week, but the one I have now is falling apart.
The home button takes a few pushes to work. And the lock button on the top doesn’t work at all. Either I plug the phone in to wake it up, or turn off Auto-Lock and leave the screen on constantly.
I bought the extended warranty, but it ran out a week ago.
Right before all these problems came up.
My friends say that Apple products are brilliantly engineered.
I’d agree, if the old one failed just as I was buying the new one.

That’s the way the tooth crumbles

While eating a Greek salad and some meatballs, the back of one of my teeth started to crumble apart.
I knew this day would come eventually. My teeth and gums have always been a problem, no matter how much I brush and floss.
I thought I was covered for these things, but my old job killed my insurance last week instead of next month. I’ll be paying out-of-pocket, and then have to file a claim when the COBRA kicks in.
The dental appointment is tomorrow, but for now, I’ll go to the corner store for gum.
To patch the hole.

Laundry Day

I live in an apartment complex with several communal laundry centers.
There’s two rows of washers and two banks of dryers.
The washers take 30 minutes to run and the dryers take 60 minutes.
So, on a busy laundry day, wet laundry piles up while I wait for a free dryer.
The problem is compounded by people who don’t collect their stuff from the dryers for an hour or two.
I use a kitchen timer for my own laundry when it’s in the dryer so nobody gets stuck behind me longer than they have to.
We really need a house.

Contender

The Houston Astros had the worst record in professional baseball last year with 106 losses.
After trading away veterans and remaining talent to teams still in contention for some prospects, they’re on track to lose even more.
I still watch the games, though.
First off, we’re coming up on September, and that’s when the rosters expand and they can call up players from the minors. They’ll play their hearts out, either making amazing plays or hilarious mistakes trying to impress.
Even better, nothing’s funnier than a play-by-play announcer for a lousy team.
What, you thought I’d PAY to see them?

Jim

I went to college before the advent of the Internet and music piracy. The compact disc was king, and they were sold in long boxes meant to fit within the record store racks as the records themselves were on the wane.
The long boxes served as cheap miniature posters, easily tacked or taped to the walls to advertise our taste (or lack of taste) in music.
The Best Of The Doors hung above a candle, and at night we’d light this shrine to Reverend Jim Morrison.
Instead of spending hours praying to him for better grades, I should have studied.

Tax Holiday

Today is the state sales tax holiday weekend, where things that students need are sales tax-free and often set at a significant discount.
Notebooks, pens, pencils, paper, clothes, and athletic gear are what typically comes to mind.
The price per item limit is a hundred bucks, because it’s meant to help poor families with kids in school.
What’s weird is that the sales tax break isn’t just for that stuff when it’s bought for students. Anybody can buy new clothes or shoes and get the discount.
But it doesn’t apply to vodka, which is what I needed most in college.

Rejection

An envelope. From a publisher.
I closed my eyes, tore it open, pulled out the letter, and looked.
I was expecting another rejection letter to join my pile of rejection letters, but instead, I received an offer.
It wasn’t for much, sure, but it was better than a rejection.
But there was a problem… a big problem.
The editor wanted me to make changes… a lot of changes.
I looked at the rejection pile… at the offer… at the changes…
Do I keep my integrity, or sell out?
The editor suggested changing that, too.
“Screw it,” I said, and signed.

Cream Of Tartar

We have a small kitchen, but apparently it’s large enough to lose things in.
So when I wanted cinnamon for my coffee, I looked on the spice rack.
Searching through cumin… tarragon… all-spice…
Ah, found it!
It was behind the Cream of Tartar, which we have never used in eleven years.
Never!
Heck, it’s still got its plastic safety seal on it.
Why does Cream Of Tartar need a plastic safety seal anyway?
In the past 11 years, have you heard of a Cream Of Tartar tampering incident?
I put the cinnamon right in front.
Where I can find it.

Tinny

Our friends own a trailer park.
They feed a lot of stray cats. And every so often, someone abandons a cat or two at their place.
We lost Bruwyn last month. He’d been hit by a car.
Myst is all alone now.
She’s never been alone before.
Before, she had Bruwyn, Nardo, and her birth family.
She needs a furry little friend.
We were going to pick up a kitten from a shelter, but someone dumped a kitten in the trash bin out at the trailer park.
We call her Tin Roof Swirl.
Myst calls her hisssssssssssssss.
It’ll take time.