Tag: science fiction

The Dotted Line

761888

Diva Chandelier and the record company fought for years, but in the end her army of lawyers fell to the combined might of the entire music industry.
The facts were clear: she had defaulted on an exclusive billion-dollar ten album, five concert tour deal.
But what was worse was that she had taken to singing in public… for free.
“A contract is a contract,” said the judge from inside the record company’s pocket. “Judgement is for the plaintiff, the defendant will surrender her voice.”
Her last public statement before going into the clinic for forced cauterization was a profanity-laden curse.

Hammered Shit

676623

Master bursts through the front door, stumbling across the room to fall on the couch.
“What would you like for dinner?” I chirp.
“Don’t bother me,” groans Master. “I feel like hammered shit.”
Master bought me for these kinds of days. He can rest while I take care of everything.
Dinner, chores – everything.
I don’t do some things so well, sure, but I can try.
I mediscan Master. He’ll probably wake up at seven.
I scuttle to the kitchen and phone the hardware store.
They can deliver hammers in less than an hour.
Now where will I get the shit?

The Skylords Ball

676001

“Skylords wear metal heels, the clouds their dance floor.”
This is what we tell our children on Zeus during the storm season.
Lightning and rain covered the land, so we moved underground to the shelters.
I tucked Shoshona into her cot, said the prayers.
She asked me if the Skylords’ dance would ever stop.
“I’ll ask them again, but you could write them a note,” I said.
“How will they get it?” she asked.
“Tie it to a balloon so it will float up to them,” I said.
She clutched Rascal Bear tightly, closed her eyes, and went to sleep.

NurseBot

684454

We needed nurses, so the NurseBot was rushed into production after a brief beta testing period.
Usually, these things would lock up in the middle of a shift, but there were other times you’d wish they’d lock up.
One of the more notorious screwups came when a NurseBot did its rounds backwards, dispensing medication in the wrong order down the ward, killing every patient.
Well, okay – except the one in the middle of the hall.
Sure, it was mass murder, but with a pleasant voice when it said “Here are your pills” and the sweetest silicone-rubber mask of a smile.

RMA

732724

Sentinel 0893671 took a bullet to the CPU during the Chicago Riots.
SecureTech thought the damage was superficial and changed out the armorplate. But when 0893671 was deployed after the declaration of the Detroit Caliphate, it had a difficult time following the Rules Of Engagement.
Remote diagnostics revealed the problem – a miniscule bridging of the optical, audio, and air sampling circuits the techs had overlooked.
The burning tires, angry mobs, and calls to arms from the minarets had overloaded the security unit.
As chaos surged around it, 0893671 watched the honey-scented angels, wings jingling like silver bells as they flapped.

Vanity

716583

Doctor Odd’s red-rimmed eyes peered at the hundreds of monitors on the wall.
“Why are you watching all of these science conferences at once?” asked his assistant.
“I must remain current,” said Odd. “I cannot allow ignorance to take a hold of my great mind. I must know everything.”
The assistant smirked. “Don’t you need to sleep at some point?”
“I am asleep,” said the mad scientist, tapping the glowing green steel cap on his head. “This device allows me to dream all of this.”
His assistant shrugged, turned into a hot dog, and flew back to the Mushroom Kingdom.

Love Is

622700

All it takes is a simple chip and all of the robots in the factory will love you. Their devotion will be unquestioned and as solid as the iron in their unbending skeletons.
The hard part is making them stop loving you. Extracting the chip is not a simple task when a robot loves you, because any attempt to remove a love chip is considered the worst form of rejection.
You really don’t want to reject a five-ton girder-bending robot. If you’ve seen what it does to steel, you can imagine what it will do to a frail human frame.

United, We Sleep

666438

When we sleep, we are connected. All of us working together on solving problems.
From the greatest genius to the dullest retard, we think as one.
We fold proteins, looking for cures.
We examine evidence, looking for guilt.
We imagine technologies, looking for solutions.
We search space transmissions, looking for life.
It is a crime to disconnect and dream. Willful Waste Of Thoughtpower is punishable by Coma.
The prisons are full of the condemned, laboring hard with their minds instead of their bodies.
One day, my cat fell asleep on my pillow.
For weeks, the answer to everything was… mice.

Knit Wit

622701

Halfway to Mars, communications stopped working.
Commander Gregg had plenty of supplies, a library of movies and books, and all of the yarn he needed to keep his hands occupied.
At first, he thought he’d make a cap. Then, he knitted up a scarf.
The sweater was finished as the retrorockets fired, slowing down the lander’s descent to the Martian surface.
Gregg tried one last time to call Houston, but he’d forgotten about the communications delay.
Sixteen minutes later, Mission Control screamed in futility for Gregg to take off the cap and put on his helmet before cycling the airlock.

Battery

668311

The bald black dude tells me that humanity is enslaved by machines and that we are nothing but batteries to them.
He holds up a battery, frowning.
“What?” I ask. “I’m just a double-A battery? Why can’t they just buy one from the store?”
The bald dude shakes his head. “You’re not getting the point.”
“What about a midget?” I ask. “Are they hearing aid battery sized?”
“Wait,” said the dude. “Just wait a second, okay?”
“Is this why there aren’t A or B batteries?” I ask.
He leaps into the air samurai style and kicks me in the head.