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RICHARD
Late
I’ve just come out from an all-company meeting with the new boss, where he laid down the ground rules he expects everyone to follow.
In particular, he was keen to stress his uncompromising stance on punctuality. “I expect you to be on time: I don’t tolerate anything less. If you’re a minute late, you may as well not turn up at all!”
That went down like a lead balloon!
Shows how little he knows us though… This lot will follow his rules to the letter. And, they’re always late.
Let’s see how he feels after a week without staff!
LIZZIE
The books on the shelf stared at him sternly.
Feeble. Uncompromising. Late.
The titles suggested a series of events that could easily be totally uninteresting or a complete disaster. Being such a positive person, he thought they were a sign that something dreadful was about to happen.
When a car exploded outside (certainly because of some lunatic defending lunatic ideas), he grabbed the three books and ran, hoping to save himself. He was about to burn them when they arrested him. “Subversive, subversive” they shouted.
While they dragged him away, he pondered about the different meanings of the word “late”.
SERENDIPIDY
“Are we there yet?”
You whimper, terrified eyes darting around the room, body twisting and straining against your bonds.
“No”, I continue, slowly and deliberately sharpening my knife, “we’ve still a long way to go.”
I must say, you impressed me greatly; I don’t think anyone has lasted as long as you, and – believe me – I was giving it my all.
And so were you.
However, all good things must come to an end.
And eventually, bruised, bloodied and broken, you too, come to an end.
As you draw your final, feeble breath, I lean close and whisper…
“We’ve arrived.”
TOM
What Could Go Possibly Wrong 028
Despite be bound from behind, the man at Parker’s feet executed a move that put him in an Uncompromising position. It would have turned the advantage to the capture, but a second roll of the earth dumped Molly on top of him in yet another Uncompromising position. Feeble he called out to the Captain who promptly yell “Give it up john. Will sort this out later, after we sort out the Leviathan. “What?” queried Ford. The ground broke and a larger eye bore down on the tiny company. “No one take a step,” calmly said Cervantes reaching into a vest pocket.
NORVAL JOE
Billbert scratched his head. “When you say, become a couple, are you saying we need to be a boyfriend girlfriend type couple?”
The old witch smiled at Sabrina and then turned her eyes back on Billbert. “It’s clear you already have a flowering teenage romance. We’re just encouraging that to grow a little more rapidly.”
A feeble old man tottered up to the witch. “It’s getting late, Gracilda. We should let these kids get home.”
Gracilda nodded to the man, but spoke to Billbert. “You have matching rings now, so you’re a couple, officially. But, a little romance won’t hurt.”
PLANET Z
I usually start my day with a banana and peanut butter.
Getting the peanut butter on the banana is the hard part.
I used to peel it then slice it, but it would break apart easily.
That’s when I’d cut off the end and slice it in the peel, then peel it.
It broke apart less easily and often.
Then I put on the peanut butter, stick the two halves together, and there’s breakfast.
Even if it does break apart, well, more pieces, right?
And the peanut butter still glues it together for the minute or so it needs that.
