Welcome to the seventy-seventh Weekly Challenge, where I post a topic and then challenge you to come up with a 100 word story based on that topic.
The topic this week was selected by Planet Z .
It’s Tangent
The excellent theme music is by Guy David
SOMETHING NEW
Due to popular demand, I am going to include stories that were sent to me, but without a recording. However, since the midget has left for sunny Coral Gables, Florida, those stories will just be posted in the show notes. You’re more than welcome to vote for them, but they will be ineligible for prizes or topic selection.
I feel that this is a fair balance between the podcast and blog natures of this content.
Feel free to share your thoughts on this decision in the comments, and we might possibly come up with an even better and more fair policy for handling these kinds of situations.
VOTING
Go ahead and listen to them by clicking on the grammophone thingy there in the left column and then vote for your favorites (multiple selections are allowed):
WE GOTS PRIZES:
I will be sending the winner a prize… it’s refrigerator magnets for the podcast. Massive amounts of fridge magnets were mailed out in the past week… watch your mail, and let me know if I’ve missed you.
It is your voting that determines who wins. So listen, vote, and tune in next week to find out who won!
ELISSON
Marvin was notorious for his short attention span, but the sun-bronzed toff in front of him at the checkout had firmly captured his interest. And not in a good way.
The George Hamilton lookalike had crammed himself into the express lane with well more than the mandated “Ten Items or Less.” And Marvin, Cashier-of-the-Month, was steamed.
For once, instead of suffering in silence, he let Mr. Hawaiian Tropic have it.
His invective-filled tirade went on for ten minutes, causing its target to slink away shame-faced, ashen.
Years later, the bag-boys reminisced: “Remember when Marvin went off on that tan gent?”
GUY
I would give anything to hear the sound of a tangent, stroking a string. My cell is dark. Light doesn’t like the company of the likes of me. I used to be a prodigy, a master of the clavichord. Now I’m just a shadow, locked in a cell.
They called her Baby Faced Angel. It happened during one of my blackouts. I don’t remember a thing. They say they found one of her hands down the alley, still clutching the string of my old guitar, same guitar I’m loosening the string of right now.
See you on the other side.
TOM
The Podcaster found himself walking in the clouds. He was still clutching a deep fried burrito. The last thing he remembered was the Houston bus, now he was stand next to the pearly gates. “I think there’s a mistake here?” said the Podcaster. Saint Peter looked up and said ” Your right. You are suppose to be at the river Styx with William Burroughs.” He grabbed the burrito and handed him an apple. On arriving in Shell Burroughs yelled “William Tell” and shot the Podcaster. Reappearing in Heaven Saint Peter shook his head muttering “Damn Tangent” handed him a banana.
PAUL
1. I notice a line touching a circle. What’s the word?
2. I work with words day after day….
3. Sometimes I hate work.
4. Well, I don’t really hate anything or anyone.
5. Hate’s easy, but it takes strength of character to forgive.
6. I used to design characters and fonts for some of the first digital printers.
7. Though you have to wonder if everything in life isn’t really digital
when it boils down to it.
8. Boiling ideas down helps me concentrate on the concepts.
9. And when I concentrate hard enough, I can see my progression of thought.
Nine thoughts.
Nine…. Tangents! That’s the word!
MIKE
Theres just something incredibly annoying
about those individuals who find
themselves monologuing, completely oblivious
to distracting tangents. Unwilling even
unable to maintain their focus.
When referring to focus of course
you think of photographs. Here
however, pictures of grandma, no
matter how sentimental, have no
bearing. And yes, we love
grandma, but her house smells
funny. don’t expect to laugh
though. This isn’t Carrottop funny,
this is who ate a dusty
burrito funny. Thats rank!
So lets rank staying on
subject a little higher, and
try to stop obfuscating issues,
instead using trenchant verbiage that
keeps tangents to a minimum.
CALEB
The tan gent’s tangents about the Plantagenets
Were the height of irrelevance on the subject of elephants
But once back on track we knew he was whack
When he told us that elephants sleep on their backs
With their tails in the air and nary a care
Cause they fear the night’s air on their large derrieres
He said the morn’s dew makes the elephants poo
And that thrice in this poo he had lost his left shoe
But I don’t think that poos could have made him lose shoes
It must have been booze
Man this lecture’s a snooze!
MAD BARD Z
My little Laplace Lolita… you can count on Susie Rickenbacker to always get off on a tangent.
No. Really. She has a thing for trigonometry.
Her eyes roll back. Her hand slowly goes under her desk.
When the bell rings, she gets up, smooths her skirt, gathers up her notes, and walks out that door with a little wobble to her step.
She sits on her sweater, so the seat’s never left damp.
She’s going to be a senior this year.
AP Physics. AP Calculus.
May need a little extra tutoring, her advisor says.
Tutoring. That’s what we’ll call it.