Category: My stories

Years ago, our town voted to Fluoridate the water.
Now, we’re being asked to vote on Somadate the water.
Scientists say Soma is safe. Just as safe as Fluoride.
But instead of strengthening our teeth and reducing dental issues like Fluoride does, Soma will make us calmer and happier.
It will reduce conflict and violence.
The proposal shows charts and graphs from test studies and other cities.
Crime rates are down. Suicide rates are down.
People are much better and more productive.
And more compliant.
Election Day comes, the election officials say “Vote yes,” and we all politely vote yes.

There are fences and cameras watching the overpasses.
Because people throw things over the side on to the traffic below.
There were a few wrecks. People got hurt. People got killed.
So, the city added the fences and cameras.
In spite of this, some people still throw things over the side.
It’s not as easy, with the fences.
But they still do.
Cops park there now, taking their coffee breaks on the overpasses.
But when the cops leave, it doesn’t take long for someone to throw something over the fence.
Avoid the freeway. Take the side streets.
They’re much safer.

The signal from the Mars colony stopped.
We tried to connect to the emergency relay satellites, but they didn’t respond.
It took a month to prepare a rocket to launch.
And several months for it to reach Mars orbit.
Long-range photos revealed nothing.
Several probes landed nearby, releasing drones and crawlers to investigate.
One went through a hangar bay, passed through an airlock, and rolled through the empty hallways.
And then, it reached the auditorium.
Hundreds of chairs, neatly arranged, a body sitting in each of them.
Were they… smiling?
Facing a podium with the chief administrator slumped over it.

When I go for my walks, I don’t wear a headset or listen to music or podcasts anymore. I’d rather listen to the birds, singing or the squirrels chittering or the crickets or the frogs. It’s so much calmer soundtrack than people trying to convince me to think like they do. Instead, I’d rather think like the birds and the squirrels. Although after years of walking in the trees, I couldn’t possibly tell you what they’re saying or thinking. Maybe it’s watch out. A big fat dumb monkey is walking around. Don’t let it cut your tree down this time.

From the void came a wind.
It blew in all directions.
Lord Foster licked his finger and held it to the wind.
He sensed… something…
There. There it was.
The void.
And he walked into the void.
His manservant Drake watched as Lord Foster vanished into the darkness.
He didn’t follow. Foster had told him to wait.
So, he waited.
For hours. Days.
Before he ran out of food or water, he ran out of patience.
And he’d only been hired for the week.
He yawned, picked up his folding chair, and went back to the car.
And drove off.

It’s been three years since Danny last danced.
He’s sitting there, on the edge of the dance floor, watching all the dancers dancing.
But day after day, he’ll watch, and then get up and go home.
Without dancing.
The next day, he’s back there at the edge of the dance floor, sitting.
And watching.
Sometimes, he smokes a cigarette.
Other times, he pulls out his phone and calls someone.
Once, a dancer walked up to Danny and asked him to dance.
He shook his head and smiled.
Maybe one day, he’ll dance again.
Or maybe he won’t. Nobody really knows.

Looking at all the sports at the winter Olympics and all the different competitions with teams and individual achievements, I wonder if they just wanna have a big snowball fight. I mean, it’s winter, you have a bunch of kids, there’s some rivalries, so why not snowball fight? You don’t have to keep score, you don’t need referees and you don’t need rules. And all the equipment you need is a good hat, a good jacket, good boots and snow pants, and really good gloves that keep your hands warm while letting you get a good grip on the snow

I like to get a car wash after I go to the beach.
It’s really to vacuum the sand up from my floormats, even though I wrap my shoes in a towel and put on slippers to avoid tracking sand in my car.
I could do that at home with a shopvac or my dustbuster, but whatever.
Yesterday, I had three car washes.
First time around, the attendant told me the soap didn’t quite dispense, go back around.
Then the vacuum system was offline, so he sent me to their other location.
For a third car wash. And a vacuum.

At the end of every contract, they mail out a FedEx label to put on a box to send their laptop back, and sometimes I like to put a little something extra in there like some candy or whatever promotional material they’ve sent me or in the rare cases they’ve acknowledged my existence, the awards were branded hat, or bottle or whatever or tote bag. Especially if it’s a shirt or some other clothing that acts as an advertisement. I seal it all up, slap the label on, and head to the Fedex store to start the next career chapter.

They say hateful things, The Hateful.
They hate anything that they don’t agree with.
“You disagree with us?” they say. “Then we hate you.”
And anyone who disagrees with that, they call haters.
They claim the right to hate whomever they want to.
And if you call the Hateful haters, well, then you’re a hater, too.
They will hate your employer until they take away your job.
They will hate your bank until they take away your money,
They will hate your family until they leave you.
Until… they realize they are haters. And stop.
Then, they become the hated.