Pick Up Artist

People ask me all the time how to pick up girls, and I tell them that you should lift from the legs and not the back.
Unless they’re so big, you need a forklift. But you don’t want to pick up those porkers, right?
Any you can pick up with tweezers are going to be a real cheap date because they don’t eat nothin.
Some, you can pick up with a radio. Those are probably way out of your league. Especially the ones on Howard Stern.
And if you can pick em up on a Geiger Counter, run like hell!