Why does Santa fly around the world in a sleigh pulled by eight reindeer?
Well, try to imagine Santa using commercial flights.
It would be really expensive to fly around the world that way.
Also, he’s horribly fat, so he’d have to buy two tickets instead of one.
And he’d have to pry off his boots at every airport, and take off his giant metal belt buckle.
God forbid someone would try to strip-search the old bastard.
Or run that sack full of toys through the x-ray machine.
If he checked it, the TSA would steal every single goddamned toy.