Findlay

If guns kill people, do typewriters misspell words?
Do ovens and stoves undercook your dinner?
Do cars and buses and trains run people over?
Do knives cut and stab people?
No. People do.
If you left all these things in a room, they wouldn’t just get up and harm the nearest person, would they?
They need some kind of user to do it.
Unless you live in Findlay.
That’s where things get up and harm people.
People aren’t safe in Findlay.
So, they try to get on the first bus out of town.
But, of course, it runs them over.