Teddy started by washing his hands.
Scrubbing with hand sanitizer..
All over his body. Twenty times a day..
He kept a safe social distance from others..
By locking himself in his house.
Working from home.
He had a stockpile of food and water.
Boiling it to kill all the viruses and germs.
He kept in communication with others through the Internet.
Well, not really.
He paid his bills online.
He just read headlines and Twitter flame wars and other nonsense out there.
One morning, Teddy slipped in the tub.
Broke his neck.
Or maybe he drowned in the hand sanitizer.