George was a pirate, but he wasn’t a very good pirate.
In the middle of one battle, he put down his cutlass, started a fire, and began cooking some beans.
“What the hell are you doing?” said the captain. “Do you want to get shot?”
“Come on,” said George. “I’m making enough to share.”
“That’s not what I meant,” said the captain.
“But I’m putting lots of ketchup in it this time,” said George. “And those cut-up hot dogs you like.”
After the battle, the surviving pirates sat down to a homestyle campfire dinner.
The captain asked for more ketchup.