RICHARD
+ Part of the team +
I frequently work from home. It’s no big deal, I don’t need to be in an office and I can get far more done, and far more efficiently than if I had to waste time and effort to get there.
Some people struggle with the concept though – I can tell by the looks they give me during meetings on Teams. Even when I use a background, it’s clear that they know. And they resent it.
So, I took a picture of the office wall, and I use that as my background now.
Looks great, but it still doesn’t fool anyone.
SERENDIPIDY
We screen all applicants before we allow them to join the coven.
People seem to think that being a witch is now trendy, and it’s all gone very New Age and woke.
We can’t have that.
So, if you’re a vegan, hippie, environmentalist, wear flowers in your hair and are into that handfasting thing, you can forget it.
We only want people with hairy warts, missing teeth, cackling voices and a fondness for pointy hats.
Cats and broomsticks are optional, but preferred.
We just think it’s important to maintain standards.
It’s a vocation and calling, after all, not a hobby.
LIZZIE
She had just left everything behind. Her home, her family, her friends, her job, her money. She needed money. Desperately. As she walked through the cobbled streets of the old town, people stared at her, a sense of strangeness brewing their uncertainty. A multitude of colorful flower pots decorated their open windows and their doorsteps. And here she was, black clothes, black eye-shadow, black nail polish. She carried a bag full of books and nothing but doubts on her mind. She smiled. Perhaps this place could become a home. Someone smiled back. Yes, this place could definitely become a home.
LISA
I’d never been particularly religious. I’d been raised a Christian but hadn’t been to church outside of weddings and funerals for an age. When we got together it felt like a religious service. I’m not sure how often it happened: more often than weekly but definitely not daily.
We sat behind a screen to chat about how we were feeling and any thoughts about the outside world. It felt like a confessional booth. He was always the one that took these sessions; he’d be wearing a kind of cape. Incense burned which would mix with the smoke from his cigarette.
TOM
In the Oddest Places
Sue Ellen had finished the laundry. Started dinner for Earl and the kids. The day had grown quite hot, so the front door was pull inwards letting the screen door filter in the hint of a breeze. She sat for sometime just looking at the front yard through the screen. At one point the mesh of the metal and the colors of the trees gave off a notifiable shift in the 4000 ag. That shift got Sue Ellen to thinking. She got out a note book and scribble out a few equations. A year late she won the Noble in physics.
Far far away 861
Bill was tired of the rat race. Sure, he had a Lotus in the driveway of the house overlooking LA, but what joy did all this stuff bring him. So, Bill called Remote Adventures. Frank the Booker for R.A. asked Bill if he was totally committed to the Extreme Package. “I’m in.” reply Bill. An hour later the front door exploded and six guys in black dropped a hood over Bill’s head. The next 20 hours all he heard was the rumble of the engine of the plane. When the plane touched down the hood was removed. This was Jungle-land.
NORVAL JOE
“Did your dad hurt his head in the car crash?” Billbert asked.
Linoliamanda closed the screen door and stepped over to a bench on the broad veranda and sat.
“He did and they wanted to keep him in the hospital for observation, but he refused to stay. Now, he gets angrier every day and shouts at my mother and me a lot.”
Billbert sat by her. “You could get a counselor or the school nurse to come talk to him.”
Linoliamanda sat up straight. “No! He would be so angry if he found out I even told you about him.”
PLANET Z
We screen job candidates through an online service that runs background checks and drug testing.
And we had a perfect success rate with the people hired and their performance.
Until last month.
Sure, the people who the service suggested as good hires were good, but they weren’t the best available.
So we did a few checks and found that they had lied on their resumes.
All of them were working for the online service and looking to get out.
Instead of rescinding the offers and terminating them, we’re keeping them on.
Who knows when such skills will come in useful.
CHATGPT
Lena stared at the cracked screen of her laptop, which flickered with a dim, ghostly light. For weeks, it had been her only connection to the outside world during a turbulent time. The emails, news updates, and virtual meetings all flowed through it, serving as a lifeline to her distant family and friends. As she closed the screen for the last time, she felt a strange sense of liberation. The sun was setting outside her window, painting the sky in hues she had almost forgotten existed. Lena realized it was time to reconnect with the real world, beyond the screen.
I have been using a Blue SnowBall, works well. A bit big yet manageable. It’s taken sometime to embrace foolishness, it suits me just fine. On … and an abundance of fuck it.
Tom