Unlike Count Dracula, Count Your Blessings is a good vampire.
He’s polite and loves children.
Not in a “drink their blood” kind of way, either.
But as in a pay for their education and sponsor softball teams kind of way.
The smart ones, he sends to college to study engineering and technology.
His castle is a hotbed of science and innovation.
He doesn’t drink the blood of any innocents.
He only drinks the blood of the criminals we bring to him.
Speeding is just a fine for a first-time offense.
Here’s your ticket.
And I suggest you not speed again.