Shadow Birthday

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When Bob had his birthday birthdays, he always shared it them with his shadow.
Happy Birthday, Bob!
All of Bob’s friends would come over for cake and ice cream, and so did their shadows for the shadows of cake and ice cream.
Bob blew out the candles, and so did his shadow on the wall.
It was a race between Bob and his shadow to see who could open presents faster. It was always a tie.
Sometimes there was a goofy clown. Other times, a magician showed up to work his magic.
One year, a strange man came to make interesting shadow puppets.
The shadows of Bobby and his friends were entertained by the hands of the puppet-master.
Why? Well, since when have you seen a rabbit or duck turn into a pair of writhing hands?

The Old Man’s Clock

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My grandfather’s clock stopped when the old man died.
Nothing could restart it. Six feet of frozen-solid works.
When the clock started back up with the first full moon we were concerned.
His tomb had been opened and his body – missing!
We looked down and saw his footprints leading out to… to…
He was out and on the prowl, one of the living dead.
We followed his tracks right up to the first tree.
He’d walked straight into it and knocked himself out.
We sealed him into the tomb, still moving.
Clock’s worth more when it runs, you know.

The Bullet in the Bible

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bang*
Bucktooth Billy lay on his back in the dusty street.
He sat up and felt his chest.
No blood. His Bible had stopped the bullet.
Billy held it up, laughing.
“Holy shit!” he shouted. “Lucky Bible! Jesus has saved me!”
The gunslinger walked up to Billy and looked at the bullet-pierced Bible.
“So He has,” said the scowling figure. “Right up to Deuteronomy.”
“It’s a miracle!” shouted Billy. “I am reborn! I will fight no more and stand at the right side of The Lord!”
“Here,” said the gunslinger. “Let me help.”
The gunslinger shot Billy in the head.

9/11

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Once the time engine was charged, I went back to the subway platform under the towers and looked for my parents.
They were trapped in the rubble, broken gas lines breathing fire all around, but I worked feverishly to free them.
Too much concrete. Too much metal.
Looking at my bloody hands, I realize I should have brought gloves.
The fire was coming closer, and they told me to leave them.
I held their hands for as long as I could, and I left them photos of their grandchildren before heading back to the engine.
We do this every year.

In His Pocket

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Leon always left his wallet on the nightstand, so Sally would put it in his jacket pocket.
For whatever reason, Leon would take it back out and leave it on the nightstand again.
So, Sally would put twenty dollar bills in all of his work shirt pockets. That way, he’d have money for lunch.
The little miracles of everyday life. They don’t last.
Sally died in WTC2, 100th floor.
After a period of mourning, Leon went back to work.
And he forgot his wallet.
At lunch, he checked his pocket, and saw the money.
He never forgot his wallet again.

Weekly Challenge #21 – Time Travel

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Welcome to the twenty-first Weekly Challenge, where I post a topic and then challenge you to come up with a 100 word story based on that topic.
The topic this week was selected by last week’s winner Kolek of the Kolektive: time travel.
Seventeen stories were submitted this week.
No rookies this week. Do we need an advertising blitz in dorm rooms or something?
And, as always, the usual madness by Planet Z.
Go ahead and listen to them by clicking on the grammophone thingy there in the left column and then vote for your favorites (multiple selections are allowed):

Who had the best story for the 21st Weekly Challenge?
Planet Z
Caleb from Black Tie Martini Club
Lisa from Lemons and Lollipops
Andrew of Dodgeblogium
Laieanna
Caroline from Quadra
T.A. Marquette of Footnote
B
Elisson from blog d’Elisson
Rahel of Elms In The Yard
Kris of Gradual Dazzle
KDP
Gavriel from Abbagav
P.J. from No Deep Thoughts
Houston Keys
Tommy from KAG Report
Will Ross from Smart Bomb Radio
Justin from Justin’s Random Thoughts
  
Free polls from Pollhost.com


Here’s the text that people sent it accompanying their stories.
PLANET Z:

Cher’s on the stage, singing that “Turn back time” song.
Sure enough, POOF! she vanishes, and finds herself back in 1964.
Cher’s back with Sonny Bono, and he’s proposing to her.
“Hell no!” she shouts, thinking she’s doing so well without him in the future, right?
She sings the song, turns ahead time, POOF! back in the present.
A total unknown nobody. Sonny made her what she is today, you see.
So, she sings that song one more time, POOF! it’s 1964, and she marries him.
She doesn’t stop the skiing accident, though.
Didn’t she look stunning at the funeral?

CAROLINE FROM QUADRA:

“Mummy.” Said Lexi rubbing her eyes as she sat up in bed. “I dreamed I was on a time travel with Spock in his space machine.”
“Humm ” murmured Mum.
“Yes he had those pointy ears, he took me to see all the stars in space. We went to Mars.”
“Really!” Said Mum.
Lexi talked on and on about her dream, mostly to Dad as Mum had a busy day.
At bath time, Mum screamed out. Peter! Get here right now. Just before Mum fainted Dad caught her. He quickly took off Lexi’s imitation ears and burned them.

T.A> MARQUETTE:

Four calls to the secretarial pool produced
the quartet of 18-year-old women
now standing at the departure gate.
Each held a black envelope.
Dr Simon motioned them to break the seals.
“Play,” read Ann.
“Convertible,” read Evelyn
“Kuwait,” said Alyha
“Wall,” sighed Sophia.
Dr Simon bid them God’s speed
as the temporal attended checked
their names off the manifest.
Kennedy Lincoln Clinton Hussein.
Sophia took a double dose of time sickness pills.
With a single word she would place
President Chelsea Clinton at the Wailing Wall.
This was going to be a Ground Zero headache.
“Time Travel was a bitch.”

B:

The grand opening of ‘2nd Chances’ had been eagerly awaited. The appointment books already filled for the next 6 months. The owner didn’t want to schedule too far in advance – in this business, emergency bookings were a given.
The fee?
$5000 for 10 minutes and not a soul on Earth would argue that it wasn’t a bargain.
Her 10 minutes chosen long ago, Fran arrived for her 2 o’clock appointment.
She declined the offered cocktail and insisted that her partner use a condom.
Fran emerged from ‘2nd Chances’ childless and cancer free.
She’d finally achieved the life she’d always wanted.

ELISSON:

The biggest risk of time travel, George told his project managers, is that it may create causal singularities.
Explain, they said.
You travel into the past. Now, you can’t go back and shoot your grandfather, because then you would never be born to travel into the past. The classic paradox.
OK, they said.
But you might inadvertently change something – even something trivial – that could trigger big displacements in the worldline. And we would never know it!
No problem, they said.
George’s time probe materialized in the late Devonian, squashing a trilobite.
Nargh shoggoth, they said, engulfing their dinner.

RAHEL:

It’s a hard life, all this traveling. And there are different people in our caravan all the time. One group arrives, another leaves, and through it all we always keep moving. We never stop, not even for the night. I don’t even think we own any tents.
People ask us to stop all the time. They beg us to stay, some with tears, others with music and poetry. And some of the places we’ve seen have been very beautiful indeed. But we have no choice but to keep moving.
In the caravan of time, there is no time.
Or sleep.

KRIS OF GRADUAL DAZZLE:

The best idea anyone ever had, Sam thought, bringing the Easy Button into her SAT. Now I can extend the time limit if I need to.
She couldn’t resist pushing the red plastic disc, just once. “That was easy,” it chirped.
The glares of the others in the room went unheeded. Sam placed the Easy Button gingerly beside her blank exam paper, opened her booklet and began. After a few minutes, she stretched her arms, inadvertently bumping the Button.
“That was easy,” it chirped.
She blinked in the bright, heavenly light. Oh, crap, she thought. Stupid thing must’ve gotten stuck.

GAVRIEL:

Laurence’s story deadline loomed. My promised 100 word opus still unfinished, I dozed off at the computer. Waking later I discovered my story’s window gone, and trudged off to bed dejected, obsessing over unfullfiled promises.
47 years of guilt-driven research later, Eureka!
I hastily recorded these words to disk, gutted my toaster, added batteries, and activated my time machine.
Suddenly standing behind my younger, dozing self, I closed his abandoned story, inserted my CD and emailed this file.
Now home again, that old story contest’s results beckon. I hope 47 years’ labor was enough to at least finish second.

P.J.:

It was most unlikely that you would ever find Paula contemplating the theory of relativity.
She had met a handsome physics professor who invited her to take a ride in his newly constructed time machine.
He explained the workings of his great invention, and not being a deep thinker she eagerly accepted the invitation.
Would she prefer to travel forward or backwards? He asked with an evil grin?
Forward please she replied, and stepped into a looming metal box with double sliding doors.
After a few moments she realized her mistake and following a well placed slap, exited the elevator.

TOMMY:

He sat in front of the machine and checked everything was ready. Then he double checked the numbers making sure they were accurate. He was always paranoid he’d forget some minor thing and everything would be ruined but this time it was perfect. Stretching, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes because he could not do this with them open.
He sat up in a panic as the shrill whistle of the alarm rang out. Reactively he slammed the button hoping he wasn’t too late. Another eight hours already gone time to get up. Damn I hate mornings.

WILL ROSS:

The Unfortunate side effect of time travel is breast feeding. You sign up for test piloting, you take certain risks as occupational hazards. Explosions, crashes, some egghead puts the decimal point in the wrong place and BAM, they’re sending you home in an altoids box. But looking at my own Mother’s rack wasn’t part of the deal and frankly I’d rather starve. What the Einstien’s didn’t figure out when they made their little machine was that it only takes you back in your OWN timeline. So here I am in a god damned diaper. Someone better come get me soon.

JUSTIN:

It’s 2021 and the Weekly Challenge podcast now runs three hours long.
In the boardroom for a major accounting firm, they’re discussing what
to do about this “pest” that’s killing productivity in their offices.
“We could block the server so people can’t access it from here”
“Are you nuts? They’d revolt.”
“How about we fire people who are caught listening to it at work?”
“We’d lose everybody”
“We could ask time-traveler Steve to prevent the challenge from ever starting.”
“I’ll ask him in a couple hours. He’s listening to it right now”
Luckily for us, he didn’t accept the mission.


Thanks to everyone for sending in their stories, and I look forward to what you’ve got to write (and say) next week.
The theme for next week’s Weekly Challenge will be posted shortly.

Wheels on the bus

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The wheels of the bus went round and round.
Right over the skateboarder.
Sure, he had pads and a helmet on, but the bus crushed his chest and killed him.
The pads, helmet, and skateboard gathered dust in the garage until they got sold at a garage sale.
That kid flew out of a half-pipe and was impaled on a fencepost.
Once again, the gear was passed along.
Kid after kid, the bodies started to pile up.
Until a restaurant bought the stuff as wall decoration.
Nobody else got hurt from using it.
But the restaurant burned down, killing ten.

Prom Coup

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For once, everything went according to plan.
We waited for the Prom King and Queen to finish their dance before rising up and overthrowing them.
Aside from Greenbaum’s nosebleed, it was a bloodless coup.
Under our regime, there’d be spiked punch. There’d be better tunes. There’d be limos for everyone.
The First Citizen’s Party Party promised lots and delivered little. The disappointed partygoers wanted to hold elections, but we tried to keep power.
From exile, the King and Queen maneuvered their loyalists against us.
The battle was fought well, but lost. They took their thrones once more, and we danced.

Humuhumunukunukuapuaa

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Caleb Bullen of the Black Tie Martini Club has decided to use really big words to make up for not having enough to work with.

Larry bred his humuhumunukunukuapuaa up there in the frozen wastelands of Minnesota because it reminded him of home. As he watched the humuhumunukunukuapuaa go swimming by he was reminded of all the kanis and wahinis that he knew long ago on the beach at hoponaunau. He sighed to his humuhumunukunukuapuaa, because he wanted nothing more than to get back to his little grass shack in kelekakua Hawaii.
Of course he did own the most successful chain of tropical fish and pet supply companies in the greater Brainerd area. So he got back there a couple times a year at least.

How the hell he pronounces that, I have no idea, but Kolek would be proud of him, I bet.

Eden

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Ever since those humans were kicked out, it’s been pretty quiet back here in the Garden of Eden.
I’m the Gardener. I take care of the Garden.
Every day, I do an inventory of all the animals, just to make sure none are missing. They never do, but it doesn’t hurt to check.
Someone could get eaten by accident. Somehow.
Well, not really. There’s no need to eat here. Not even plants. Just soak up sunshine and dream all day long in perfect eternity.
Don’t tell God, but every now and then I punch a giraffe. Just for fuck’s sake.