Migration

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Watch the spaghetti for me.
Don’t let it overcook. And don’t let it escape.
Remember the last time the spaghetti got loose? It took an entire legion of the Baron’s soldiers to subdue and drive back to the kitchen.
If it hadn’t been so delicious, both of us would have lost our heads.
They say that spaghetti is supposed to be easy, but when you forget to salt the water, all kinds of curses and maliciousness gets into the pasta.
The meatballs are screaming again?
Best not to serve them at all. We’ll use olive oil and pepper this time.

Predetermined

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You can’t change fate. Everything is predetermined.
From the beginning of time to the end of time, everything has been planned for.
Even the roll of the dice has a set outcome.
Don’t bother trying to escape from your fate.
This doesn’t means you should just sit there and let things happen.
Because the times you make happen, well, those were fated to happen, too.
The fact that everything happens according to a plan means you are completely absolved from the results of your actions.
This is what I’ll be telling the judge about those seventy-eight murders you committed.
Psycho.

Weekly Challenge #153 – Swimming in de Nile

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Welcome to the Weekly Challenge Number One Hundred And Fifty Three, where I post a topic and then challenge you to come up with a 100 word story based on that topic.
The topic this week was… was…. um…
It’s Swimming in De Nile.
The excellent theme music is by Guy David
VOTING

Which were the best stories from Weekly Challenge #153?
Tom from http://midi.libsyn.com/
Guy from http://guydavid.com/
Caleb from http://blacktiemartiniclub.com/
Lynda from http://sisterpepperspray.blogspot.com
Jeffrey from http://greathites.blogspot.com
Justin from http://thespaceturtle.com
Anima from http://zabbadabba.com
Norval Joe from http://www.norvalsoutlook.blogspot.com/
Houston Keys from http://tatertotsforthemasses.blogspot.com
Mike from http://mjpaxton.com
Planet Z
  
Free polls from Pollhost.com

Go ahead and listen to them and then vote for your favorites (multiple selections are allowed):


Tom

Alma Sue Louise, that was her conformation name, was a deeply devoted catholic had that amazing logical off twitch which allowed her to believe in spite of all mounding evidence that her husband Leroy Michael Joseph was cheating on her with no less that her childhood friend Mary Margaret Xavier Sullivan.
“Girl” said her mother, “if you believe that man
of yours is faithful youall is treading water in Egypt.”

What Momma?”
“Yous is swimming in de Nile.”
“I don’t know how to swimming.”
“Lordie child
“I’m going to have to drop you
“in Jean-Paul Sartre end of de pool.”

Guy David

The young princess went skinny dipping in the river, when she spotted a small ark flouting on it. She fished it and found a crying baby inside. She got home and asked her father, The Pharaoh, if she could keep him. “Sure” her father said, “As long as you take him for walks. I don’t want him shitting all over my palace.” She thanked him and decided to name the baby. At first she thought of calling him Moses since in her language it meant “the one that got fished from the river”, but then she just called him Fiddo.

Caleb

While swimming in the nile
I met a crocodile
As our eyes met
Down the bank he swept
He gave me such a smile.
I thought then how I’d wish
I’d not had so much fish
Down in my guts
With wine and nuts
To make a croc’s stuffed dish
The croc began to swim
With vigor and with vim
On up to me
I tried to flee
And pleaded unto him
The croc said pleased to meet you
Now I’m not here to eat you
You won’t be gored
By the tourism board
I’m simply here to greet you

Lynda

In the summer of 1927 I was part of an expedition to uncover the lost temple of
Sobek-Ra, the crocodile god of Egypt. It was hot inside the tombs, but it was even
hotter outside. At the end of the day we’d wash the sand and sweat off in the
river, ignoring the warnings of the locals about what lay beneath the surface. I
was the only only one to survive.
I still hear the sound when I try to sleep. Those days were called the roaring
twenties for a reason, just not the reason anyone wants to admit.

Anima

“Momma Neith, is it October yet? I want a tasty tourist…”
“Sssh… No tears, Sobek. Big crocs don’t cry. Look! The feluccas are coming
down river. Be still… Go with the flow. Lower your head more… just nostrils
out of the water.”
“There’s one… the lady trailing her fingers in the water…”
“No, she’ll never go swimming and She looks too old anyway… keep on looking.
Let’s wait for a boat filled with young people. Listen for the loudest one.
Tourists rarely pay attention to anything floating quietly, plus, they find
the Egyptian sun so hot…”
“I am a log…”

Jeff

there are only so many things one person can do, no matter how hard
that person works. I was living proof of that. Here I was, I thought
I had it all under control. My wife was happy, my kids were happy, my
boss was happy. Heck most days I was pretty sure that I was happy.
Then we had to get the swimming pool, the pool was great the kids
loved it. Then came the lap machine, one that makes a current. The
all stood and laughed cranking, that was when I realized I was
swimming in de Nile.

Justin

When Discovery Channel scientists developed a camera that could see into
ancient times, current archeology became a thing of the past. The first
documentary, Egypt, broadcast live.
Many amazing discoveries were made about ancient Egypt. It was a very
nihilistic society. Activities at a bath proved that Chiropractic care
already existed. It was even discovered there was a sales team that sold
giant stones and involved higher ranked salesmen taking part of lower ranked
salesman’s earnings, it was the first pyramid scheme. The most amazing
discovery revealed that Pharaohs were buried with sweet lozenges to help
deal with their sarcophagus.

Norval Joe

Michael Phelps likes to do everything fast. Whether it is chopping vegetables, signing autographs or learning to speak Chinese, with Rosetta Stone.
On a flight to Europe the in-flight movie was Crocodile Dundee, and that gave him an idea. Redirecting his return flight through Egypt he went to the Nile to show Paul Hogan what he was made of. In his speedo, he jumped in to outswim the crocodiles.
His goal was to beat the records he set in the 2008 summer Olympics. Instead, in London, in 2012, he’ll be in the paralympics, competing as a double, below knee, amputee.

Houston Keys

You ask ME about swimming in de Nile?
I did it once, but only once. Leeches and creepy crawlies in my nether
regions convinced me to give it up. Besides camel dung and plagues and
all that other stuff takes away from the fun.
Sometimes de Nile isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. I used to watch my
buddies swim, but some seasons all they could do was wallow in it as
there wasn’t enough crap to actually swim in.
Well, enough wool gathering about my own youthful indiscretions.
I prefer to let the president swim in it now.

Mike P

Deanna Nile had become a celebrity at age 17, when her first CD
dropped and sixth grade girls went nuts. Her parents hired bodyguards
to protect her from the loonies, but they had limits. When she snuck
off and met her dealer, her guards didn’t know where she was. Nobody
did, except for the dealer. And Harry, her “number one fan.” The
bodyguards found Deanna in the alley behind the club 15 minutes too
late, her blood pooling on the ground. Cockroaches were swarming, and
as it began to rain it seemed as if they were swimming in De Nile.

Planet Z

Once, long ago, Egypt boasted many rivers.
One by one, these rivers were picked up and hauled away by various conquerors.
Dragged before royal courts in chains, forced to bow before kings, used for sport and pleasure.
Louis the Sixteenth powered his fountains with The River Anubis.
Pretty soon, all that was left was the Nile.
Too valuable to lose, Nasser ordered the construction of the Aswan Dam for its protection.
It’s worked well. Until today.
Our team is ready and waiting in Sudan, and with one word, the trap will be unleashed.
So, President Mubarak, about that billion dollars?

The Sleeper

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My little girl couldn’t fall asleep.
So I told her to close her eyes, think of clouds, and count slowly to ten.
She always fell asleep at five or six.
But one night, she got to ten.
And she was by the bed, shaking me.
Wake up, Daddy, she said.
She does it to her classmates, at their desks.
She doesn’t even have to count out loud.
She just thinks of clouds and counts to ten.
What happens when you count backwards? I ask her.
She shakes her head. No, she says.
I feel tired, so I don’t ask again.

Floating

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It rained hard for a day, and the bayou looked like it would overflow, but it didn’t.
We watched tree branches and other junk flow with the water.
Then, a dead body. Jeans, jacket… face down and not moving.
Well, okay. It was moving downstream.
Around the bend, another body floated by.
Two bodies.
Instead of calling the police, we placed bets.
I bet on the first body. It had a good head start.
But the other one was coming up fast.
Mine got caught on a tree branch, and the other won.
Only then, did we call the police.

The Prison of Oz

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Dorothy and the Cowardly Lion sat in the prison cell, weeping.
The Scarecrow had insisted that they take him apart and slip him through the bars.
“I can go for help!” he said cheerfully.
So, they pulled out his straw and threw it with his empty clothes out the barred window.
They blew away in the breeze.
The Tinman insisted that he could slip through the bars if they hammered him flat.
The heavy wooden bench proved useful for this purpose.
It also proved destructive. They called out to him, but the Tin Man did nothing but twitch and moan.

Hawaii

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I saved up for a year to go to Hawaii.
I kept a calendar, marked every day off until it was time.
First class ticket, champagne and leg room.
They put one of those flower necklaces on me.
Checked into the hotel, and then took a taxi to a party.
First time I ever had poi.
That’s when my throat locked up.
I’m allergic, it turns out.
Spent the whole week in the hospital.
I don’t remember the flight back.
Yeah, being allergic to bees or gluten would suck.
But I can’t help but think this was far, far worse.

Curses

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The Great Mage, The Master of Kraken, taught me that all curses should be removed in reverse order as they were inflicted on the victim as to not cause harmful effects as they are unbound and dispelled.
Like turning the pages of a book. Auras overlap, but a good wizard can carefully determine the proper procedure in less than a day.
Never rush a job because someone’s dying from their afflictions. That can be delayed or cured, too.
With that in mind, where is this werewolf with the Midas Touch that’s been turned to stone?
I love a good challenge.

Rite of Passage

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Some societies have complex and deadly rites of passage. The elders really bust your ass.
Others require that simple rituals be performed. That kind of cake walk makes for a weak man and a weak tribe.
The times sure have changed since my tribe roamed these lands, before fences. Before the white men came.
My great-grandfather had to hunt ten rattlesnakes on his own. Now, my grandson gets a hundred bucks worth of chips and is told to make it last the evening.
Otherwise, we’ll throw a rattlesnake at him.
Maybe the times haven’t changed all that much after all.

Weekly challenge #152 – Wikipedia Wildcard!

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Welcome to the Weekly Challenge Number One Hundred And Fifty Two, where I post a topic and then challenge you to come up with a 100 word story based on that topic.
The topic this week was… was…. um…
It’s The Wikipedia Wildcard.
The excellent theme music is by Guy David
VOTING

Weekly Challenge #152 – who had the best stories?
Tom from http://midi.libsyn.com/
Guy from http://guydavid.com/
Lynda from http://sisterpepperspray.blogspot.com/
Michael S.
Caleb from http://blacktiemartiniclub.com/
Justin from http://www.thespaceturtle.com/
Ashley Story #1
Ashley Story #2
Anima from http://zabbadabba.com
Norval Joe from http://www.norvalsoutlook.blogspot.com/
Planet Z
  
Free polls from Pollhost.com

I forgot Caleb in the first poll version, so votes are reset.
Go ahead and listen to them and then vote for your favorites (multiple selections are allowed):


Tom

Its a crate diggers Concerto, jazz pulled long and hard through a hip hop ringer washer. Looping breaks of Johnny Hammond, Morricone, Ellington and session men who smoked up the room with Coltrane, A Love Supreme. A mix of a man with a thousand names takeN one from a man of a thousand faces, Lord Quas. Otis Jackson Oxnard’s own Madlib DJ supreme. Its a blunt indulgent work without the hope of salvation but on its cover the Via Crucis, The Stabat Mater Dolorosa, thorn crowned hound, pluck chicken of god, and an Aunt Jemima Benedictine mocking the fourth Station.

Guy David

Plutonium trifluoride is not to be trifled with. Those violet crystals are investigated as a source of nuclear energy in some well known laboratories by respected scientists, but that’s not their real power. Mixed with the right ingredients using the right combinations of words whispered in exactly the right intonations, great things could be accomplished, sinister things too. Structures can be changed, tissue morphed into shapes. You see that little green monkey over there? That was my assistant. You better excel in your tasks here. I’ve got many of those violet crystals left, and I know how to use them.

Lynda

Hello and welcome to the 2009 Speedway Ekstraliga! It is jam-packed tonight! Poles from pole to pole have come to witness an exciting rematch between Atlas Wroclaw and
Lotos Gdansk! Neither team did very well last season, but they don’t that stop
them!
As they round the far turn–what’s this? Jason Crump has stood up on his motorbike
and is turning to drive directly into the path of the other riders!
He’s holding something…wait…it’s a sports drink! The other riders are grabbing
the bottles tossed by Crump. I seem to be watching an advertisement. The race
hasn’t started yet.

Michael S.

“Hello everyone and welcome to our annual bat convention.”
“The big topic this year is the newly discovered variety in the bat kingdom,
the “baseball bat”.”
“This is not your typical Gray, Indiana or Virginia big-eared bat.”
“It is found, for the most part, around the Louisville area.”
“As you can see in the slides it is a very muscular mammal as if it is on
steroids.”
“We invite you to swing by our area here in the front and throw as many
questions as possible at us.”
“Together we will build a knowledge base for our new friend the baseball bat.”

Justin

At Hoover Dam Dr. Hudson reached out with his energy-sense and saw the
ambient energy with second sight. Using ethereal fingers he grasped the
energy in handfuls, stuffing them into a pocket inside himself. He went as
fast as he could to win the Power Plant to Power Plant Worldwide
Teleportation Race. His destination was the Pyhäkoski hydro-electric power
plant in Muhos, Finland. He burst himself in to tiny particles and shot
them across the planet with sheer force of will. He reassembled himself atop
the power plant. “Hurrata” the crowds cheered. Dr. Hudson had finally
reached the Finnish line.

Caleb

Deus Meus
we need someone to pay us
cuz all we ever hoped to be
was students at St anthony’s
Deus Meus
Come and join the craze
We gotta get some kind of start
to get an educated heart
don’t wanna be no fool
in a public school
in the town of suffolk
all us kids are really fucked
unless we’re paying catholics
Deus Meus
We don’t mind the gays
if with priests we get defensive
our tuition’s more expensive
Deus Meus
we need someone to pay us
cuz all we ever hoped to be
was students at st anthony

Ashley

I’ve always loved making it on trains. But my favorite has to be the South Wind. That happy jaunt from Chicago to Miami was always the best. That’s where I lost my cherry. The wife and I later became charter members of the streamliners club back in 1953. Nothing says loving like making whoopee on a moving train. Our little group found the big O in more sleeping cars than I can count. We would have reconsummated our 50^th wedding anniversary aboard the South Wind, but the streamliner was renamed the Floridian. In the end, we used the dryer instead.
I’ve always loved making it on trains. The South Wind passenger train was definitely my favorite because it was my first. My wife and I joined the streamliners club shortly thereafter. As charter members there wasn’t a passenger train that was safe. Even though that was decades ago, we still get after it when the surviving members of the club can get together. Times change but thanks to Viagra the club still keeps it up. Now, where’s that damn train, it’s late. Whatever happened to following a schedule? I just took my last pill and time’s running out to perform.

Anima

Behind me are the Izubra cataracts. The Vlach, native to the Carpathian
basin, have protected these rugged, pristine waterways for thousands of
years; It is an ancient obligation for them.
The waterfalls of Serbia are portals to MiddleEarth, the land of the
dwarves. The Vlach owe their allegiance, repayment for assistance in
driving out invaders during the Roman conquest of this region. In exchange
for magical arms, they promised to protect the secret entrances hidden
behind these tumbling waters.
The latest intruders aren’t as tough as the Romans. Extreme kayakers’ double
paddles are pitiful when matched against a spiked halberd.

Norval Joe
http://www.withoutsanctuary.org

It looked like the entire town came out for the event. There was a carnival
atmosphere in the town square. People just like us gathered to view the lynching.
See, here’s the postcard. The black man raped a white girl; no one is sure who the
girl is, but there were plenty of white witnesses. There was a grim fascination as
they hauled him up and some commented and even laughed at how he thrashed about.
They mutilated his body afterwards. It didn’t seem right, what they did. But they
were good people who did it, people just like us.

Planet Z

She’s a pretty thing. Not pretty enough to strip anymore, but she had smarts enough to become a nurse.
I know she doesn’t love me. Who cares? My damn family hates her. A lot.
They should. If we get married, she gets everything.
Good.
Candlelight.
Wine.
The best sheets on my bed, the one I’ve been confined to for the last three years.
I pick up the ring. It’s gigantic. I hold it out.
And… that’s when… when…
The big one hits.
She screams, grabs the ring, and puts it on.
My damn family will get everything. Except that ring.