As I strolled down the avenue, I realized that my shadow was not my own.
The embassy frequently warned us about rogue shadows, the shadows of their greatest and most successful spies.
“Watch your back!” Say the posters.
This is why all official business happens in specially-built light rooms, with light coming from all directions to purge any rogue shadows.
Trapped in dark prisms and shadow boxes, kept in a massive safe.
Until the enemy offers an exchange.
Their captured shadows for ours.
Lining up on the bridge, facing each other, flashlights and spotlights to ensure they are genuine.
Author: R.
What is new
The problem with naming things New is that they eventually become old.
New Coke was a total flop, and Coke had to bring back their old formula.
They called it Coke Classic, eventually dropping the Classic along with New Coke.
New Wave music ruled the late 70’s and early 80’s, conquering consciousnesses through MTV.
Until the fad was replaced with newer music, coming back now and then as retro through tribute acts.
Then there’s New York and New England.
What’s so new there?
They’re just old, dilapidated piles of rubble with the occasional bright and shiny sticking out of them.
Stealing home derby
I don’t know what’s so exciting about the home run derby.
Some guy lobs easy pitches to a batter, and they slug them over the fence.
Over and over and over.
Where’s the challenge in that?
What I really want to see is the steal home plate derby.
That’s where the real excitement is, a guy stealing home.
Although it’s kind of hard to do in a derby, since they know the guy is going to try to steal home.
So, instead, let’s go with a Bench Clearing Brawl Derby.
Give the winner a pickup truck.
And an ice pack.
Credit card offers
Elwood had a decent credit rating, so he got a lot of credit card offers in the mail.
They were better than the high-interest service fee cards he’d gotten when he was poor and broke.
But he looked at the cashback offers for the store cards, and he noticed that they paid out less than other general bank cards for the same category.
So, he broke into his neighbors’ mailboxes with better credit ratings, got cards in their names, and ran up huge tabs.
Then he drove off to Mexico.
At least the neighbors got good cashback on his fraud.
Dog walkers
I like to walk to the grocery store every Saturday.
If it’s going to be a very hot day, I go as early as I can.
And I take a route that’s through a nice neighborhood with shady trees and wide sidewalks.
There’s joggers, people pushing strollers, and others going to the store or coming back from it with their bags.
Today, I walked past a couple walking their two dogs.
Well, one was laying on the ground, not moving, and another was sniffing it and whining.
The couple was crying.
Maybe it’s too hot out to walk, after all?
My Battery anxiety
When I broke my elbow, I was stuck in the emergency room with a phone at 3% battery and no cord or spare battery.
A doctor let me borrow his charger so I could get texts out to friends, and they convinced the gift shop to send a cord to my hospital room.
And cookies. And iced tea. And stuffed bears.
Since then, I’ve had battery anxiety.
I bought a plug-in hybrid car instead of a Tesla because of battery anxiety.
And I panic when I see a coworker’s shared desktop on Zoom when they’re not plugged in and charging.
Weekly Challenge #940 – PICK TWO Still, Officer down, Random Action, One two three…, Pure, You never know
JUSTIN THE SPACE TURTLE
Three… You never know how it’ll turn out. You thought it would be amazing, as endless as anything can be this side of Heaven, and be a little slice of it.
Two… surely it’s just a challenge, it will be OK, just try again, learn, try harder, be better. Push through the pain, do the best you can.
One… It’s not right anymore, you say. You’re told you’re wrong, but also that you’re right, and it’s done.
Zero… It’s over, gone, and there’s nothing left but the broken pieces of your life. And the struggle to keep what should remain.
DAVID
Officer Under Fire
“Officer under fire!” blared across the radio.
Andrew Macarthy had been in fistfights and gunfights, fended off dogs, and had cars crash into his own at breakneck speed. This experience put them all to shame, for a child held his fate. Constricted with no way out, a chill running over him, he could only wait.
One shot fired, missing by inches.
A second shot, a little closer.
Andrew looked out the glass, where the child held his baseball with fiery eyes. The kid wound up and threw—bullseye!
Andrew plunged into icy water with shocking effect.
“Officer down!” the announcer cheered.
RICHARD
Officer Down
“He’s lying very still, Sarge… I think he’s dead”
The sergeant gave me a grim look, “Let’s hope not. Bad enough having an officer down, without it becoming ‘killed in the line of duty'”
We inched forward, wary of hidden shooters but, as we neared the body, we sighed in relief at the sight of the rise and fall of his chest. He was breathing.
No… Snoring!
A nudge from my foot brought him to bleary-eyed, surprised, wakefulness.
To be honest, I think the Sarge would have preferred ‘killed in the line of duty’ to ‘sleeping on the job’!
SERENDIPIDY
You never know quite what the immediate future is going to bring.
Any random action can result in unforeseen consequences; like that trip over a paving stone, that sends you flying helplessly into the path of a bus!
Unlikely, I know, especially if you’re the cautious, careful type; but accidents can happen!
Then again, it may be the random action of somebody else entirely that completely ruins your day.
Like the moment I sneak quietly up behind you, and randomly push you into the path of that approaching bus.
It wasn’t me though.
You tripped over that paving stone, right?
LISA
Gathered
The fire crackled; my muscles, stiff from spending months on the floor, began to unknot in the warmth and comfort of the heavily cushioned sofa.
“When I gathered the first of you it was a completely random action.” Our faces all grimaced at his word choice. “I’d just got the idea of starting something pure but, believe me, this really wasn’t the beginning I wanted for it. It felt like the exact opposite of what I wanted. I had no choice”
He winced as if this was hurting him when it was us it affected.
None of us had spoken.
LIZZIE
One, two, three, something… The numbers got jumbled in his head. He wanted to call her. He never understood why she had left. He was a caring husband. He yelled at her sometimes, true, but it was just to toughen her up. He always bought her flowers afterwards. The ungrateful would make a face and walk away. Two, three, something… No. He still loved her. But she abandoned him when he needed her the most. That punch was… Well, but she talked back. Three, one… He kept trying to remember it, not knowing that she had long changed her number.
TOM
Everyone has their Reason – Rule of the Game
Morty had lived his life by other people’s rules. Parents, teachers, Bosses, wives, anyone of authority. He was old and dying inside. The logical option was finding some high bridge and take a swan dive. It was here he met Arthur. The man was set on the very edge of the bridge rolling 20 sides dice. After each roll the man beamed joyfully. Morty inquired about the purpose for the dice. Art said: Random action you just never know. He stood up and walk away. Morty got a pair of D20-s. He smiles lot these days. You just never know.
856
Dancing on a volcano
Scribble on a soggy and dirt piece of paper were the numbers 1027. On the front was written the name Franz Lens. The woman knew the importance of getting this missive to the man. She back-tracked over a wide section of Paris. Never looking directly over her shoulder. But on one cut, in a window pane she saw the ss officer. Quickly she ran to the door of the bakery. A shot rang out. She fell. As the baker held her in his arm she spoke: Contact Lens. The baker stuffed the note into a baguette. Made for the egout
NORVAL JOE
Billbert didn’t wait. As soon as they got home, he went to his room and called the hospital. When he asked for Sabrina, they connected him to the nurses station.
“Can I talk to Sabrina?” Billbert asked.
“Are you a family member?” the nurse replied.
“No. I’m her best friend.” He tried to explain.
“I’m sorry. If you’re not family…”
Billbert interrupted. “All her family is dead. I’m all she has.”
“Still,” the nurse said. “You’re not family. You never know, if she comes around, I’ll tell her you called.”
Billbert gasped. “What do you mean, if she comes around?”
PLANET Z
Einstein warned that God does not play dice with the universe.
But old Alfred, wild-haired as ever, there in the alley, muttering baby needs a new pair of shoes and throwing dice with his grad students.
“Princeton doesn’t pay for shit,” he said later, stuffing money into his pockets. “Washington doesn’t either.”
As the years went by, Einstein lectured less and gambled more.
Many said he’d peaked in 1905.
Instead of research papers, he produced photos, postcards, and posters.
And admission to Princeton became a commodity, even if the kids ended up dealing at his casino nights and serving drinks.
CHATGPT
In the stillness of night, Officer Mark patrolled the quiet streets, his thoughts drifting to his daughter’s laugh. Suddenly, a random action shattered the calm—a gunshot. One, two, three… Mark raced towards the sound, finding a fellow officer down. In the chaos, he acted on pure instinct, applying pressure to the wound. As sirens wailed in the distance, Mark realized the fragility of life—how you never know when a routine patrol could turn perilous. Yet, amid uncertainty, he found solace in the pure determination to protect and serve, knowing every action, no matter how random, mattered.
Murderball
When Fall comes, I like to move my laptop to the patio table and work from outside.
Of course, I need a second monitor. And a power cable for the equipment.
Maybe a large fan, when the breeze isn’t blowing.
Then there’s the wireless keyboard and trackpad. And my phone.
Don’t forget the pitcher of iced tea. And lemons. And ice.
When everything’s set and ready, that’s when the sun comes out.
And that glowing orange murderball screams I WILL MURDER YOU WITH MY HEAT AND LIGHT!
I pack everything back into my little cart and drag it back inside.
Go out and
So many people on their timelines encourage others to vote.
Sometimes for one candidate. Or the other.
Or against one of the candidates, implying that you should vote for the other one.
And then there’s the general calls to vote, without any particular candidate in mind.
Just vote.
I don’t ever endorse people to vote for a candidate. Or against one.
Or even encourage people to vote.
If you’ve ignored every other call to vote, for or against, or at all, and it’s all down to what I think…
Just give up. Tear up your registration card and go away.
Dogshit Alley
Even though there’s dog waste bag dispensers and disposal kiosks, people still walk their dogs and rarely pick up after them.
It stinks, it’s unhealthy, the shit’s all over the sidewalk, and my laundry cart ends up rolling over the turds.
So, I go from door to door with an ultrasonic dog whistle and blow it.
If I hear a dog barking, I make a note and move on to the next door.
After getting an inventory of dog owners, I wait until night, and then I shit on their welcome mats.
“You’re welcome,” I shout, and run back home.