George was a pirate, but he wasn’t a very good pirate.
Still, he had his moments.
Every Christmas, George put on a Santa suit and played Santa for the crew’s Christmas party.
They’d line up to sit in his lap.
“What would you like for Christmas, little boy?” he asked in a deep jolly Santa voice.
They’d ask for new boots, new swords, a pile of treasure, their own ship, or to retire as a barkeep with pretty wenches.
“Sorry,” George would say to them, “You’re a pirate, so you’re on my naughty list.”
George got beaten up a lot.