George was a pirate, but he wasn’t a very good pirate.
Usually, pirates would exchange their loot for gold, which they’d have melted down into earrings.
George didn’t have any earrings. He didn’t like the idea of getting his ears pierced.
“What if it gets infected?” George asked the ship’s doctor.
“I think an earlobe infection is the least of your concerns,” said the doctor, trying to figure out how to dislodge George’s sword from his abdomen. “How the hell did you do this to yourself?”
“Please try not to break my sword,” said George. “It cost me a lot.”