George was a pirate, but he wasn’t a very good pirate.
He wished he was a good pirate.
He blew out all the candles on his birthday cake and made a wish.
Nope.
He carried around a birthday cake and shouted if it was anybody’s birthday.
When someone said “Yes” he’d light the candles and demand that they blew them out and wish that George was a good pirate.
“Say it out loud,” he’d say. “Or I’ll have ye guts for garters.”
Nope. Still didn’t work.
But he did make some good money as a novelty birthday telegram that way.