The 100 Word Stories Podcast

• Lizzie
• Richard
• Tom
• Norval Joe
• Serendipidy
• Duane
• Justin
• Kayden
• Planet Z

TOM

Sometimes it’s just the bunny and you

I had crossed the great part of the California. Pulled in a roadside gas
station, as if there are gas stations deep in the interior of the
California Hegemony. The old man at the pump turned a lazy eye toward a
blur on the western desert. “What’s that on the horizon?” I asked. “Coming
for you I reckon.” I flipped down my goggles, set the resolution to
10,000. “Oh fuck, him,” I cured. “The out man disappeared behind a steel
door. I reached into the car for the tow missile. When the bunny came into
range, I let the tow sing.

NORVAL JOE

Billbert and his parents sat around the small table with its variety of wines and cheeses. Mrs. Blanketmaker took out her tablet and brought up Google Maps. There were several red dots on the map of the U.S. “These are places we’ve lived.”
Exasperated, Billbert blurted, “I hate this. Can’t we just move to a new address in town?”
His father cleared his throat. “Now Billbert. Don’t bark at your mother. This isn’t her fault.”
His mother smiled sadly. “I know this is a major disappointment from your point of view, Billy. For our safety, it has to be done.”

SERENDIPIDY

I’ve been studying hypnotism.

I was inspired to give it a try when I saw a stage show where a hypnotist made a guy from the audience quack like a duck.

It seemed to me to be a useful skill to have, so I taught myself how to hypnotise.

I’m good at it.

I can make you bark like a dog, or hop like a bunny, quit smoking and overcome fear of flying.

But that’s boring.

And there’s far more interesting things I can make you do against your will.

And the best part?

Afterwards, you won’t remember a thing!

DUANE

Xard was a wizard, but he wasn’t a very good wizard. He boasted he had perfected alchemy. He gathered a crowd at the marketplace and produced a small box.

“I will turn this bronze coin into gold within this magical box.”

Slipping the coin into the box he held it up.

Pointing past the crowd he shouted, “What is that on the horizon?’, flipping the box over as the crowd turned to look.

“My bad.” He then opened the box to reveal a shiny gold piece.

Ten days in the stocks gave Xard time to think about his next trick.

JUSTIN

Phil was taught at Wizard school that wizards were elegant and orderly in their ways. Phil also caused several rules to be instated after his expulsion. No chewing gum while casting spells. No teleporting while wearing roller skates, and no practicing rituals while drunk.

When extradimensional vermin poured into reality it was Phil who sent them all back when he could cast the necessary spells under all sorts of strange circumstances. He would have said “I told you so” to his old professors, but proper wizards with orderly, organized magic were the first and easiest for the vermin to consume.

RICHARD

In any other circumstances, I’d have considered the view to be pretty spectacular; mile upon mile of glistening waves as far as the eye can see, tinted burnished gold by the setting sun.

Fantastic for photography, amazing for a holiday, wonderful for getting in touch with nature, but pretty rubbish if you happen to be stranded on a dessert island, beach strewn with the wreckage of your boat, desperately hoping for some sign of rescue.

Wait a minute, your eyes strain in the fading light… What’s that on the horizon?

Does it matter?

They won’t see you from there anyway!

KAYDEN

HARE TODAY, GONE TOMORROW
Frank was forced to leave the School of Wizardry after the unfortunate incident involving Dean Lapine. The Dean was irritatingly proud of his long, flowing curls and carried a mirror with him at all times to admire his impressive appearance. At the Friday Spell Spectacular, while the Dean hovered above, it was Frank’s turn to perform. However, Frank grew confused as he mouthed the incantation for the standard “pull a rabbit out of my hat” spell. When he reached in to grab the hare, instead he pulled out a handful of hair. Dean Lapine was never the same after that.

LIZZIE

She sat there and watched the horizon. The view was stunning. She closed her eyes and waited. She didn’t know what she was waiting for. She just knew she had to be there. And she sat for a long time.
A dog barked far away and she snapped out of her hypnotic state. The horizon was still there, the view still stunning.
And then she knew why she had to sit there, waiting.
She knew she had to learn that despite everything she was going through, she could still come back and sit down, quietly, peacefully, and be. Just be.

PLANET Z

The old wizard was up on stage, blundering through all of his old tricks.
He tried to pull a rabbit out of his hat, but ended up with an iguana.
Which barked.
Do iguanas bark?
I don’t know, but this one barked, and it wasn’t a bunny.
He poured milk into a newspaper cone, and it soaked the cone and spilled all over the floor.
It took him nineteen guesses to guess the card his volunteer pulled out of the deck.
Eventually, he threw some dust in the air to disappear.
Which the audience had already done long before then.

• Lizzie
• Richard
• Tom
• Duane
• Serendipidy
• Norval Joe
• Jared
• Planet Z

LIZZIE

The hand, the foot, the wall. Don’t do it. But they did. A hand, a foot, a wall. Just any wall, just any foot, just any hand. The drawings held the secret, they said. And everyone believed them. We found them. And everyone believed them. They are centuries old. Everyone stared in awe. Scientists came from the capital to check and re-check the wall. And they believed them. By then, it was too late. They couldn’t say a word. The hand, the foot, the wall… Tourists loved them. Locals loved them even more. Money and jobs. Yes, money and jobs.

RICHARD

Maybe

Maybe I should try to do something with my life? Take a few risks, go out on a limb and see what I can make of myself?

Maybe I should quit the job, sell the house, liquidate my assets and travel the world, experiencing new cultures, places and ways of life?

Maybe it’s time I threw caution to the wind, strayed outside my comfort zone and seized the day, and to hell with the consequences!

Maybe it’s time to ditch mediocrity and the safe, unassuming life I’ve made myself, and invite danger, uncertainty and adventure in?

On the other hand…

TOM

I finally Got It, just like Coltrain.

You could argue, was it the voice running up and down the octaves? The
moves that would leave a mere mortal in traction. The lyrics so playful
and just plain party. The flash of purple head toe, toe to head. The band
an engine of funk rolling down funky town. The beat that drills down make
you want dance beat. Maybe it was as simple, as the one eyed stare, that
knowing look, your mine, and I would die for you. For me it was that
gentle hand making love to the love shaped guitar. The artist previously
known as.

DUANE

Most of my clothes before high school were hand-me-downs. It was common for neighbors and friends to pass around boxes of clothes that had been outgrown. I ended up wearing a lot of baggy shirts, stuffed into jeans with the cuffs turned up to keep from tripping over them. Sometimes the box had been sitting in an attic awhile. I spent most of third grade dressed in red and white striped bellbottoms with a paisley tunic shirt.

We didn’t hand down shoes. Everyone held on to favorite shoes forever. My Converse All Stars were down to laces and rubber toes.

SERENDIPIDY

They do say not to bite the hand that feeds you, but I’ve never subscribed to that.

For me, biting is the only option – you can’t exactly suck the flesh off roasted fingers, no matter how succulent they may be. And although I suppose it’s possible to slurp a nice crispy piece of skin from the back of a hand, it’s rather messy, and not at all dignified.

And good luck licking the meat from a boiled wrist; I don’t fancy your chances.

So I’ll bite, and gnaw and chew, until I’m done.

Then I’ll eat your other hand.

NORVAL JOE

Billbert’s mother held up her hand to signal her husband to wait. “Really, dear. I think you should stay here and we can make a plan for what to do about our burned-down-house and our super-powered son who’s just been outed, instead of chasing off after the guy who is likely to become the center of most of our future problems.”
His hand still on the doorknob, Mr. Blanketmaker paused. “I’ve got to hand it to you, Joan. You are always the voice of reason.”
Joan smiled knowingly. “Join us Billbert. This affects you as much as any of us.”

JARED

His hands were once thick and meaty. Even though age and disuse have shrunk his hands, mine will always remain small in his. `His knuckles are thick and swollen from boxing for his high school, when that was still a thing. In the pale skin, there are scars from when he lost a fistfight with a table saw. There are too many lines and divots, some pink, some colorless white, in his skin that show the untold knicks and cuts and scrapes of a life. Unseen are the marks of discipline administered, or a record of acts of service bestowed.

PLANET Z

Twenty thousand years ago, a person put their hand print on the wall of a cave.
Over the years, hundreds of others put their hand print on that cave wall.
Maybe thousand, layers of layers of prints on top of each other.
So many colors, so many different formulations of pigments they used.
Clay and crushed rock and blood and resins.
A simple message to the future: I was here.
Alphonse tracked the gold vein back to the cave.
Drilling holes, putting in dynamite, and blasting the rock.
Sifting through the rubble, washing the grit to reveal the gold specks.