Weekly Challenge #866 – PICK TWO The way we were, Waterproof, The wrong words, Bottomless pit, Safe, A word from an unknown language

Princess

RICHARD

Only words

It doesn’t matter what I say, or how I say it; the truth of the matter is that all you ever seem to hear are the wrong words.

You hear only want you want to hear, twisting and misinterpreting what I say to your own ends, and turning them against me.

I don’t know where it all went wrong, or why you changed.

I never changed.

Why haven’t I left? After all, that’s what you want, isn’t it?

But I’ll never leave.

Because I still believe you can change again.

And once more, we can be the way we were.

LIZZIE

The way we were always using the wrong words was a waterproof ticket to getting ourselves into a bottomless pit of trouble. It was definitely not safe to poke the beast but we insisted on doing it. At some point, we even came up with a language of our own. “Speaking in an unknown language won’t get you out of this mess,” she said, her eyes rolling in a remarkably odd way. We wanted to laugh but we didn’t, of course. Instead, we underlined random words in her books. Till this day, she keeps trying to figure it all out.

SERENDIPIDY

You imagine you’re safe.

Hiding away in the depths of the forest, far from the sounds of village life, you shun the daylight, sneaking out only under the cover of darkness, snatching a few stolen leftovers from the cooking fires, and covering your tracks at the first hint of dawn.

You imagine you’re safe, but you’re not at all.

You will never be safe.

And when the next full moon rises, the men of the village will seek you out, hunt you down and drag you, kicking and screaming to the elders.

A virgin sacrifice.

Cast into the bottomless pit.

DUANE

I looked over the old leather box with my flashlight. Somehow it had remained waterproof. Inside was a small delicate sheet of yellowed paper. In the center were two diagonal lines and an arrow pointing away from them. I held out the paper for my guide to see.

“I have heard stories of that mark being found in caves near my village,” he said.

“You are about to embark on a great adventure, my friend.”

I was excited, but didn’t think I could solve the meaning of the symbol before my time ran out. Maybe I’ll come back next week.

NORVAL JOE

Billbert frowned at Sabrina. “These two guys aren’t from the Guild of the Dark Knights. They’re just bullies.”
“That’s right,” the one in the middle of the sidewalk said. “We’re bullies and we’re going to beat the crap out of you. Bringing girls with you isn’t going to keep you safe.”
Sabrina spoke a word from an unknown language and clouds began to gather around them.
Billbert smirked. “I hope your jacket’s waterproof, because you’re about to get really wet.”
The bully stepped forward laughing. “My mom always said a little rain never hurt anyone, but my fist sure has.”

PLANET Z

When Sadie was born, she was constantly making noise.
Laughing, screaming, cooing.
And then, her first words.
At first, her parents thought they were babble words.
But they were utterly incomprehensible.
“We’re not sure what they are,” said the experts.
Colleges and universities around the world worked on the mystery for weeks, until one researcher figured it out.
“Does she have candy in her mouth?” she asked.
Sadie’s parents pulled a lolipop out of her mouth, and the kid swore up a storm.
“This is the last time we let the doctor give her those after a visit,” they said.

Limited unlimited

Unlimited isn’t unlimited.
Unlimited data plans eventually cap your speed.
Unlimited web services eventually claim you’re causing system issues for the other users on the server or the network.
Unlimited car wash plans will eventually get you a tap on your window from the manager.
And the granddaddy of them all, all you can eat buffets will eventually make you sick, and you’ll end up in the hospital while the owner adds you to the ban list.
Good luck trying to get a call out from the hospital… shouldn’t have sent all those unlimited texts and calls this past month.

Not so smart bulbs

A while back, I replaced some light bulbs with LED bulbs.
They were more expensive, but saved electricity.
Then I got some smart bulbs I could control from my phone.
It was amusing to change the colors, but a hassle to reconfigure when the bulbs reset.
Then I picked up smart bulbs that worked with a hub that I could control from my phone or watch.
Saying “Turn on the bedroom light” before going in there was great.
But I’d manually flip the switch to turn it off.
So the next night, the bulb wouldn’t respond.
Smart bulb, dumb owner.

Tomorrowland today

When I was a little kid, my parents took me to DisneyLand. DisneyLand!
Over in Tomorrowland, The Carousel of Progress showed how technology progressed throughout the Twentieth Century.
I totally lost the point, and made fun of the guy without a dishwasher, and the small television, and everything else we had and they didn’t have yet.
That was before the war, of course.
Now, nobody has anything.
No electricity.
No water, no food.
Radiation got into everything.
All that’s left is scraps we fight over with each other.
The big bright beautiful tomorrow, underneath the mushroom cloud and nuclear winter.

Rule the airwaves

For fifty years, Topher Gobin ruled the airwaves.
Television. Radio. Even rainbows.
When he saw a rainbow, he could make it bend this way and that.
He could make it dance, or change colors.
He’d tie them into shapes like circus clowns tie up balloon animals.
And when there was a double rainbow, well, better hide the children.
The things he made them do, you’d get arrested in Alabama if you did it out in public.
He had an extortion racket with baseball games and outdoor weddings.
Pay the man, or have your event ruined.
On live television and radio.

There goes King Cecil

Launches are more safe than the early days of spaceflight.
No more explosions on the launch pad or heat shield failures on re-entry.
King Cecil the Fifth enjoyed his holidays in orbit.
Zero gravity acrobatics suited him well.
When the institute developed a new engine for a solar system cruiser, Cecil insisted on seeing it for himself.
“Turn it on,” he commanded.
And the ship vanished into relativistic speeds.
The constitution is vague on succession.
Cecil is not dead, only far away, experiencing one second per our year.
We are ruled by a dynasty of regents.
Until Cecil’s eventual return.

Patton

He was a general, then a senator, a president, and finally a professor.
His grave is by the football stadium.
He asked for a simple plain stone, nothing tall or wide or fancy.
And that’s what he got. A small white cube, no writing or decoration.
But the fence around it is intricate wrought iron, and a brass plaque with gold lettering adorns the gate.
Carefully tended flowerbeds surround it, a flagpole and spotlights.
The leaping fountains and animatronic dinosaurs are a bit much, sure, but the kids love them.
Especially when they’re ridden the rollercoaster, merry-go-round, and Ferris wheel.

Weekly Challenge #865 – Record

Sleepies

RICHARD

Night Errors

Why is it that we have all our best ideas at the most inconvenient times?

For me, it’s always in the dead of night, lying in bed, when in that half-waking, half-asleep haze, storylines will wander unbidden through my mind; chapters, plots, characters and narrative slip into my thoughts, to form perfectly composed and complete stories.

Of course, by the following morning, I’ve forgotten everything. That bestselling story, lost forever.

I started keeping a notebook by the bed, just to record those nocturnal thoughts. Problem solved, you’d think.

But no. I’m so sleepy, I completely forget it’s there!

LIZZIE

He told her the coffee sucked.
She didn’t take it lightly.
He sneered. The situation was funny.
She said “no”. As a matter of fact, she heated a cup and threw it at his face.
He didn’t think the situation was funny anymore.
She laughed because now she thought it was hilarious.
He didn’t laugh.
She told him “chill”. Coffee was just coffee.
He said that coffee wasn’t just coffee a minute ago.
The burn mark on his face cost her a few years of her life.
Sometimes laughing becomes a serious matter, especially when you already have a record.

SERENDIPIDY

It was me.

I did it. It was all my fault, and I’m the guilty party.

You may not be able to prove any of it, in fact, I’m quite sure you can’t, but as God is my witness, I’m completely responsible, and proud of my achievements.

Maybe my confession is enough, but I doubt it will stand up in a court of law, especially since the star witness – me – will be conspicuous by my absence.

You won’t catch me. You don’t even know who I am.

All you will ever know, is that I’m responsible.

Just, for the record.

ZACKMANN

I asked a music instructor what would be an easy instrument for an older person to learn to play. I had a recorder like they tried to teach me to play in elementary school in mind.

He asked me why now. I told him that I’m a big fan of The Mutual Audio Network podcasts and would like to introduce my grandnieces to audio drama.

When he mentioned he still didn’t understand my sudden interest in playing instrumentals

I informed him that many of the shows I think they would like, warn children shouldn’t listen unless accompanied by an adult.

NORVAL JOE

Billbert headed for the gate of the junior high school with the two girls following him. “Are you following me?”
Sabrina said, “No. We’re just going home.”
Billbert stopped. Just beyond the gate were the two boys that picked the fight with him.
One of them blocked his way. “You thought you could escape without taking your beating. Come to me.”
Sabrina took out her phone and turned on the camera.
“Are you going to record this to show the principal?” Billbert asked.
“No. For the coven,” Sabrina said. “I want to show them how you vanquish the Dark Knights.”

TURA

Record
———
Old things are dangerous. Brute matter, no upgrades, no revisions. Antiques, my girlfriend called them.

Her latest find was a black plastic disc a foot across. “I haven’t found a playback machine yet,” she said, “but listen.” She took a pin and dragged it along the surface, and I heard a faint snatch of music.

“Data storage? In moulded plastic?” I groped for words. “But that’s…”

“Permanent recording?” she said blithely.

“Yes!” I shouted. “Do you realise the penalties?” I snatched it away from her and broke it over my knee, then threw the fragments into our apartment’s memory hole.

PLANET Z

I remember the first record I bought.
It was a Monty Python album I bought from my brother, who was getting rid of his comedy albums.
I got a bunch of other comedy albums from the store, like George Carlin and Emo Phillips.
And I listened to them a lot, over and over.
They filled the gap between comedy specials on HBO, because this was before streaming and on-demand.
Over time, I got tapes… then CDs… then MP3 downloads.
I don’t know what happened to my records or record player.
I shrug, and look up Gallagher on YouTube, and watch.

We all scream for nostalgia

I remember all of the ice cream shops in the town I grew up in.
Knights was at Cleveland and 161, and they’d have all kinds of handcrafted flavors.
We went there after I ran a red light and needed to chill out.
Friendly’s was a chain that had great peppermint ice cream.
But not much else.
There was this stand in Central College on the way to school, but I rarely went there.
Not much parking.
Finally, there was the Dairy Queen by the South high school along the main street, but that’s not really ice cream, is it?

Waiting in line for meds

The doctor calls in my prescriptions for me.
I could get them delivered, but the Post Office make enough mistakes as it is.
So all I have to do is pick them up.
It’s not like it costs much… my prescriptions are simple and cheap.
Maybe a buck for a month, after insurance.
Waiting in line, I overhear people arguing over hundreds of dollars and those shady benefits plans you hear commercials for.
It makes me grateful to have insurance, at least to be healthier than these people.
Maybe next time I’ll pay in advance and use the drive-through window.